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Politics : Sharks in the Septic Tank -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: thames_sider who wrote (14917)	5/30/2001 12:37:52 PM
From: one_less	Respond to of 82486

I agree with you and Karen that "forgiveness" is the stickiest item in the list. Most people like it but they can't rationalise why. I agree that it is hard. My rationalization is that it allows us as individuals and as a society to move on. We can verify the behavior of the individual who is doing the forgiving but not the heart felt intentions. (this is true of all the listed items by the way but this one is the stickiest). We can verify when society has forgiven someone (they get released from custody). Truth is my fave. I deal with this issue all the time. Most people I meet support the little white lie, escape claus. I don't. Lets look at the example you gave of the depressed wife and telling her her husband hates her. This is a woman who desparately needs to trust someone. If you tell her to trust her husband who loves her, she may feel better for the moment. In time she will realize you were decieving her. Then, she will have one more person that she knows not to trust. I see the short term gain for the two of you but the long term counts more to me. Why would you need to make a point of telling her that her husband hates her. Even though it is the truth it seems cruel to pound her with it. There are many other truths that seem more in line with providing support for her well being, like the fact that you feel compassion for her circumstances and would like to support her through a difficult time. There is a time and a place for everything and the truth about her husband will come out in time as will the truth about the childs divorcing parents. I wouldn't advocate blabbing everything you know to be the truth to people who have no need to know that information at the moment you have it. That would fall into a catagory of wrongs like gossiping, rumoring (not on the list). Do as you would be done by... Definitely a "Do"