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Politics : Foreign Affairs Discussion Group -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Bilow who wrote (5672)	10/16/2001 6:55:58 PM
From: CountofMoneyCristo	Respond to of 281500

If the US has enough politeness to rename "Infinite Justice" and arrange media opportunities with the President barefoot in a mosque, surely the Saudis can find the ability to not insult us on our foreign policy just after we suffered our worst civilian combat loss ever. Yes, indeed.

To: Bilow who wrote (5672)	10/16/2001 7:18:02 PM
From: HG	Respond to of 281500

Yes, of course. But youre missing my point. You are assuming everyone is as sensitive, cultured and dignified as we are. And you allowing yourself to get worked up coz they aren't ! I am at a loss to explain what I mean....but let me try ONE more time. When my kiddo comes and hits me with a broom, or a saucepan, or any object that really hurts me....i have two objectives to make him stop. One, to prevent myself from getting hurt. Two to reinforce his good behaviour and discourage the bad. I'd like to do this in a positive way which is best for everyone. I believe I have 3 choices. A) I ignore it, or tell him to be careful with the pans and help him put them away. His intellectual level is not comparable with mine but even a kid knows when he's being unreasonable. I can still be hurt by him, but unprovoked, he may grow out of it over time. I believe by being kind, I'm leading by example. B) I politely tell him that it is a wrong thing to do. If there are guests, I would take him aside and tell him that. I'm being quietly assertive. All goals are met. C) I hit him back. He screams and throws a tantrum. We spoil a perfectly good evening. I'm reacting to his bad behaviour. He may stop doing it, and my first goal may be met, but I'll fail in the second. I wonder how many of us go the C) way... And yet, when it comes to group behaviours, why people choose the least conducive way. HG@ILovedMyOrganisationalbehaviourClass.com <puff puff...still explaining....puff puff...but tired...puff > <g>