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Politics : PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: TigerPaw who wrote (194727)	10/22/2001 11:33:03 PM
From: Ann Corrigan	Respond to of 769667

This might come in handy someday: Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden If You’re Invited To A Dinner Party At His Secret Afghan Lair: Pause for a moment, listen carefully, and say, "Doesn’t that sound a lot like a B-52?" Ask whether the Taliban gets cable, because you haven’t seen "Sex and the City" for weeks. Yank the end of his turban really hard to make him spin around like a top. Refer to him as "Osama-osama-fee-fi-fo-fama bin Laden". Ask whether suicide bombers have to pay union dues. Tell him it’s lovely what he’s done with his cave, but that it’d look much nicer covered with huge, smoking craters. Ask him if he wouldn’t mind if you opened the door and shined your laser pointer on his forehead for a few minutes. Mix up his Rubik’s Cube. Ask whether the Taliban is hoping to be bombed ahead into the Stone Age. Explain that America is a land of freedom and opportunity, filled with people of every race, religion, and background, including millions of women strong enough to knock the crap out of him. Claim that they serve much better falafel at the public executions in Sudan. Swirl your drink thoughtfully and mention, "Just think , in a few weeks you might fit in this glass!" Check to see if Saddam is on his speed-dial list. They have to wait a few years to see current television shows in Afghanistan, so give away the secret of who’s having a baby on Friends. When you leave, wave and say, "Shalom!"