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To: Sawdusty who wrote (79077)	11/2/2001 5:49:53 PM
From: grusum	Respond to of 116950

Hi Sarge, I suspect most people have had about enough of my off topic discussion on this thread, so this will be my last reply on this topic on this 'gold' thread. If any further answers are requested, I will PM them. I understand what you're saying. When people say that they want 'respect' what they really mean is approximately, "I want you to treat me well". There are two ways people get treated well. One way, is as you say, out of compliance through fear. Two of the things that can generate fear are brutality or power over another in general. The act of compliance though, is part of the action of respect. The other way people can be treated well is through honor and validation. This is what you and I suspect Darleen really mean by the word 'respect'. Most people would prefer to be honored or validated rather than feared, but some people of course do want to be feared. The differences in the words are subtle but if they are kept in mind, it helps to facilitate a better understanding of our fellow men. If I have misrepresented either you or Darleen, I apologize.