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Pastimes : NNBM - SI Branch -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Clappy who wrote (7050)	11/9/2001 2:43:17 PM
From: she_x	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 104181

that was funny clappy some good stuff on that site. thanks, she

To: Clappy who wrote (7050)	11/9/2001 3:40:59 PM
From: Dalin	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 104181

Clapster, Mailman is here: If the world was fair to men. 1. Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29th, so it would only occur on leap years. 2. On Mothers Day, you'd get the day off to go partying with the boys. 3. St. Patrick's Day would be celebrated every month. 4. Instead of "beer-belly", you'd get "beer-biceps". 5. Tanks would be FAR easier to rent. 6. Every woman that worked would have to do so topless. 7. Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack on the butt and a, "Thanks for the sex - now take off." would do it. 8. Birth control would come in ale or lager. 9. When the Police pull you over, every smart-aleck answer you responded with would actually reduce your fine. As in: Cop: "You know how fast you were going?" You: "All I know is, I was spilling my beer all over the place." Cop: "Nice one, that's $20.00 off". 10. Daisy Duke shorts would never go out of style again. 11. Every man would get four real Get Out of Jail Free cards per year. 12. Telephones would cut off after 30 seconds of conversation. 13. Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed as an acceptable response to, "I love you". 14. The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO. 15. "Sorry, but I got wasted last night", would be an acceptable excuse for absence and/or being late to something. 16. Lifeguards could remove people for violating "public ugliness" laws. 17. Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again?" cards. 18. Beer would have the same effect as Viagra. 19. When it was time to leave work, a whistle would sound and you'd get to slide down the back of a Brontosaurus like Fred Flintstone. 21. The most common wedding shower gift would not be a toaster, but would instead be a pair of kneepads. :0) Ramblin