Kathleen Howley's column
I am going to try to say this without sounding like a man-hating feminist. Here goes.
There are few things in life more disgusting than men who, when discussing abortion, use the phrase: "I can't tell a woman what to do with her body."
It's like a password. It's usually pronounced with a self-satisfied smile. They're saying, "I'm cool. I'm a supportive kinda guy. I'm sensitive to the needs of women."
Yea, right.
Sometimes, there's a slight reluctance in their voice as they recite the mantra. Those are the ones who believe that while they, personally, are opposed to abortion, they couldn't tell a woman...blah, blah, blah.
You've heard it before, I'm sure.
In most cases, these guys have never, in their lives, used the words "chaste" and "dating" in the same sentence. You can bet that many of them are pretty adroit at telling a woman what to do with her body, if it happens to serve their own needs.
Abortion, or "choice," as it's euphemistically called, becomes a requirement, for many of them, because it has the ability to erase any unforeseen problems caused by their lack of moral discretion.
I was at a G.O.P. cocktail party last week, and a man used that old line on me: "I can't tell a woman what to do with her body."
I gave him the logical response: "What about the body inside her womb? What if it's a male body, a little boy? Surely that can't be her body, because she can't be a man and a woman at the same time. Can you tell her, in that case?"
He looked at me glumly. This was not the response he expected. He probably assumed, because I'm a young woman, that I'm pro-choice.
Not a wise move. Three major studies within the last four years show that women tend to be more pro-life than men.
Makes sense, doesn't it? We're the ones with the maternal instincts, and if we know the facts of life -- meaning all the stuff you never read in the newspaper, such as what an abortion does to an unborn child -- many of us come down on the side of the baby.
I've been around enough men to know that they occasionally daydream about great feats they would perform if, for example, they suddenly found themselves trapped, with their whole platoon, under enemy fire. It's one of the most charming qualities of men, this desire to prove themselves to be brave and fearless.
But, so many men fail to realize that all around them, in our modern world, are opportunities to show their valor. Every day, they are confronted with opportunities to witness to the truth -- situations which, perhaps, take more courage than saving a platoon from enemy attack.
Once a month, I attend a rosary vigil with about 200 people in front of a local Planned Parenthood clinic. I see the woman going in for abortions, some reluctantly, some being steered through the door by a man who is probably the father of the baby.
After about 45 minutes, some of the men come out, alone, looking relieved. They did their duty and sat in the waiting room with their significant other until it was time for the abortion, and then they get to go off -- get a cup of coffee, read the paper -- while she's in the recovery room.
What bothers me is that most of these guys are dressed as if they were on a date -- as if they were on the way to the movies. Except, this date involves the destruction of their children, and the wounding of their girlfriends.
I'm with the early feminists, when it comes to abortion. Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Susan B. Anthony, Dr. Alice Bunker Stockham, and the whole crowd of them were staunchly pro-life. They called abortion "child murder," and the "exploitation of women and children."
More emphatically, they pointed out that abortion primarily serves the needs of the predatory male. In a July, 1869, article in "The Revolution," the feminist newspaper edited by Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony, the latter -- of current U.S. one-dollar coin fame-- wrote:
"Guilty? Yes, no matter what the motive, love of ease, or a desire to save from suffering the unborn innocent, the woman is awfully guilty who commits the deed. It will burden her conscience in life, it will burden her soul in death; but oh! thrice guilty is he who, for selfish gratification, heedless of her prayers, indifferent to her fate, drove her to the desperation which impels her to the crime."
In her day, Susan B. Anthony was describing a tiny minority of men. Today, you'll run into hordes of them at just about any political cocktail party you attend.
But, still, there are countless other men who dare to swim against the tide -- men who respect life, and respect women, at a time when neither is required by the world.
Those are men who don't have to daydream about performing feats of great valor. They do it every day.
By Kathleen Howley |
