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Pastimes : FLAME THREAD - Post all obnoxious/derogatory comments here -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Peach who wrote (12452)	2/15/2002 1:12:58 AM
From: Druss	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 12754

An SI Exclusive interview: To all, we recently arranged an exclusive interview with the head of the Russian figure skating judges, Boris Lenko. With skillful and pointed questioned SI was able to get forthright and open answers to the questions going on about the judging in the Olympics. SI: Here Boris, have another drink? Boris: Da, what is this stuff, it is very good. SI: Oh, it is called EverClear, it is sort of an American vodka, pretty strong. Boris: Vodka is best drink, I drink vodka all day, never get drunk. SI: That's what I have heard, EverClear is a touch stronger than vodka, it is around 195 proof, maybe a little more, but not much more than that. Boris: Is good this stuff. SI: Yep, it is kind of a liquid wrench, you can get things tight or loose, in this case we just want to loosen a tongue. Boris: So what you want to talk about? SI: Oh, the judging in the pairs competition. Boris: Why you Americans care about that anyway? What do you care what happen to Canadians? SI: Hmmmm...That is a reasonable question. I think it is because they are the only other country in the world that makes a good hamburger. Boris: Hamburger?? Oh Yes, McDonald's!! We have one of those in Moscow, they make most excellent food. SI:....Interesting, I think I will put my gastronomic tour of Russia on the old back burner. Boris: This hamburger making, it is because they are so close. I think maybe Mexico makes good hamburgers too, they are close. SI: Boris, you would be a braver soul than I ever have been if you would eat meat you couldn't identify in Mexico. Let's get back to judging, it has just come out that the French judge was 'pressured' and the French delegation is saying she was 'weak willed'. Boris: Da!! She was very weak willed, particularly weak willed when given bundles of 1000 franc bank notes. That was not the reason that Russian pair won though, one reason but not big reason. Russian pair won because of tradition. SI: Tradition? You mean the Canadian pair choosing 'Love Story' for their music instead of a more classical piece, or perhaps their skating style? Boris: Nyet, not that tradition, real tradition. Russian pair always win, that tradition! SI: So the voting was already decided. Boris: Of course! Finest Olympic tradition. And most completely in Olympic spirit. Athletes come and skate, all talk about the important thing is they are here, they get to skate. Pressure is gone, because they know Russians will win. They get to share in Olympic spirit with other athletes. That most important thing, they say so themselves. SI: What about the talented ones who come here and are superb skaters and want to win and maybe deserve to win? What about them? Boris: Nyet, Olympic spirit is still there for them. Besides it is necessary for judging to be done this way. It avoids controversy and cheating. SI: Avoids controversy and cheating!? Are you serious? Boris: Of course am serious, you never see anyone say they feel judging cheated Russian skaters. Druss