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To: E. Charters who wrote (85538)	5/20/2002 1:42:48 AM
From: E. Charters	Respond to of 116836

A word about swinging cats. Take a firm grip on the tail, and nimbly and quickly, swing the cat in a wide arc away from your body at arm's length. Try to develop about 3 G's right away, (31 RPM) and resist the temptation to "shorten up" to get more speed. (Al Catpone did that once. And so did Davy Crockcat. That coonskin cap was actually a permanently fixed cat that his doctor advised him never to remove.) From back to front that is: "one potato" to the back, "two potato" to the front. You should get a satisfying "swoosh and skree" as the feline reaches escape veloco-kitty. Pretty well all the mice for 50 yards around will go into hibernation at that point. If you have the mower running on its side or the hay bailer, you can release at this point on the tangent towards the machinery. A sudden "skreeaaioow-klutz" and silence will satisfy that the you will not need to put out milk to get the cat back in that night. (See "what to do about kittens" in our up coming composting installment.)