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Pastimes : The New Qualcomm - write what you like thread. -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Uncle Frank who wrote (5018)	7/29/2002 11:27:55 PM
From: Maurice Winn	Respond to of 12231

Hmmm, <just tell the Misses she's putting on a little weight.> Are you saying that a birthday present of a year's Jenny Craig isn't likely to be as well received as a Kyocera 7135? Reception for those is great I believe. Everyone should give one to their wife with a year's free Jenny Craig, for added romance and turbo coding boost to their convoluted and concatenated relationship. Okay, maybe it wasn't a complete brawl, but with provocation, you could perhaps build it up a bit. I got a PM from him telling me you were a jerk and that your feet stink and that you should be banned, not him. I suggest you PM him and tell him what you think of him... While you are waiting for a reply, you could study economics. I guess from the last example that NZ is ahead in genetic engineering: <> TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: > > You have two cows. > Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. > You sell them and retire on the income. > > > AMERICAN CAPITALISM (or Enro-capitalism): > > You have two cows. > You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of > credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity > swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, > with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are > transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by > the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your > listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an > option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United > States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the > release. The public buys your bull. > > > AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. > You are surprised when the cow drops dead. > > > A FRENCH CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > You go on strike because you want three cows. > > > A JAPANESE CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and > produce 20 times the milk. > You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them > worldwide. > > > A GERMAN CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk > themselves. > > > A BRITISH CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > Both are mad. > > > AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: > > You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. > You break for lunch. > > > A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > You count them and learn you have five cows. > You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. > You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. > You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. > > > A SWISS CORPORATION: > > You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. > You charge others for storing them. > > > A CHINESE CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > You have 300 people milking them. > You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman > who reported the numbers. > > > A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION: > > You have two cows. > That one on the left is kinda cute... > Mqurice

To: Uncle Frank who wrote (5018)	7/31/2002 4:32:03 AM
From: Maurice Winn	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 12231

Uncle Frank, I clicked on your profile to see where you are posting and found you banning [sensibly and he is hereby banned from here too] Auric Goldfinger. Message 17815894 Lenin eh? Would you like to be unbanned from here and become a Trotskyist or the like? By the way, I didn't really get a PM from whathisname saying your feet stink etc. I was just trying to stir up trouble [but was amused to see he actually was being grubby]. Bad luck about the bet with MarginMike. $100 for $100. Ouch. But cheer up, you are in good company. Mqurice [okay, maybe a little bored]. PS: Actually, I think this stream is immoderate, so you can't really be banned. Ramsey isn't really banned either, but I like to ban him just for fun.