To: Lane3 who wrote (53758 ) 8/3/2002 10:42:48 PM From: maried. Respond to of 82486 Karen, your article brings up some excellent points. Mr. McWhorter states the following....Most people's lives are far from perfect. Those who have known neither parental divorce, severe illness, social ostracization or extended emotional trauma are exceptions, whom many of us privately dismiss as "boring" or "too perfect." We often think that a little hard-core misery would do these people some good! Indeed, most of us would worry that the child who has known no suffering is at risk in later life. In my eight years teaching here, I can attest that among students of all classes and races, those who cannot refer to at least one unfortunate stain upon their life trajectories are rare. Recently, at the memorial service for 5 year old,Samantha Runnion, Orange County Sheriff Michael Carona read the following proverb requested by the family.Kisa Gotami had an only son, and he died. In her grief she carried the dead child to all her neighbors, asking them for medicine, and the people said, "She has lost her senses. The boy is dead." At length Kisa Gotami met a man who replied to her request, "I cannot give you medicine for your child, but I know a physician who can. Go to Sakyamuni, the Buddha." Kisa Gotami repaired to the Buddha and cried, "Lord and Master, give me the medicine that will cure my boy." The Buddha answered, "I want a handful of mustard seed." And when the girl in her joy promised to procure it, the Buddha added, "The mustard seed must be taken from a house where no one has lost a child, husband, parent, or friend." Poor Kisa Gotami now went from house to house, and the people pitied her and said, "Here is the mustard seed, take it!" But when she asked, "Did a son or daughter, a father or mother, die in your family?" they answered her, "Alas! the living are few, but the dead are many. Do not remind us of our deepest grief." And there was no house but some beloved one had died in it. Kisa Gotami became weary and hopeless, and sat down at the way-side, watching the lights of the city as they flickered up and were extinguished again. At last the darkness of night reigned everywhere. And she considered the fate of men, that their lives flicker up and are extinguished. And she thought to herself, "How selfish am I in my grief! Death is common to all; yet in this valley of desolation there is a path that leads him to immortality who has surrendered all selfishness." Putting away the selfishness of her affection for her child, Kisa Gotami had the dead body buried in the forest. Returning to the Buddha, she took refuge in him and found comfort in the Dharma. Buddhism. Buddhaghosa, Parable of the Mustard Seed Everyone has sorrow and suffering in their lives...some more or less than others. It is in learning how to survive that sadness and to go on with your life that makes one stronger. I would think that a better gauge for future student enrollment could be to describe how they had survived their trauma, how they had learned to use that tragedy to reach out to the community and to serve others. That would be the best indicator of who would be a candidate a college would value. Marie --------------------------------------------------------------------------------