in honor of Male Slut week...I give you RICO, Suave --followed by Weird Al's version<g>
Rico Suave
Gerardo
Seguro que han oído que yo soy educado
Soy un caballerito un chico bien portado
Un joven responsible y siempre bien vestido
Yo no se quien ha mentido
I don't drink or smoke ain't into dope
Won't try no coke, ask me how I do it, I cope
My only addiction has to do with the female species
I eat 'em raw like sushi
No me gustan ternos, mi estilo es moderno
Si me enterno, you me enfermo
Mi apariencia es dura, vivo en la locura
No me vengan con ternuras
So please don't judge a book by its cover
There's more to being a latin lover
You got to know how to deal with a woman
That won't let go
The price you pay for being a gigolo
There's not a woman that can handle
A man like me
That's why I juggle two or three
I ain't one to commit, you can omit that bit
You pop the question that's it
Haber uno, dos, tres, cuatro mujeres
Y la situaci?all?no muere
No es un delito calmo mi apetito
Con un llanto o un grito
So again don't let my lyrics mislead you
I don't love you but I need you
Would you rather have me lie
Take a piece of your pie and say bye
Or be honest and rub your thighs
Well, it's ten o'clock and I'm two hours late
I never said I was a prompt date
But you kept persisting that I meet your parents
Huh, they're going to love my appearance
Ding dong el timbre suena
Tu madre abre, que vieja mas buena
Le digo ¡Hola! Pero no para bola
Que se ha creido vieja chola
Go and serve the food mom
Que tengo ambre
If you don't hurry, me va a dar un calambre
Y usted señor? Why's your chin on the floor?
Sierra la boca por favor
What's this amor, these little huevos?
Esto s?que yo no pruebo
I'm used to good ol' fashioned
Homestyle Spanish cooking
If i try that I'll be puking
Well it's been a pleasure but we got to go
Regresaremos temprano
Cinco, seis, o siete de la mañana
Su hija esta en buenas manos
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Weird Al's "Taco Grande"
Taco... grande. Taco... grande
Yo quiero chimichangas y chile colorado
Yo tengo el dinero para un steak picado
Las flautas y tamales, siempre muy bueno
Y el chile relleno
You see, I just gotta have a tostada, carne asada
That's right, I want the whole enchilada
My only addiction has to do with a flour tortilla
I need a quesadilla
I love to stuff my face with tacos al carbón
With my friends, or when I'm all alone
Yo tengo mucho hambre y ahora lo quiero
Un burrito ranchero
So give me something spicy and hot, now
Break out the menu, what you got, now?
Oh, would you tell the waiter I'd like to have sour cream on the side
You better make sure the beans are refried
Taco... grande. Taco... grande
Well, there's not a taco big enough for a man like me
That's why I order two or three
Let me give you a tip, just try a nacho chip
It's really good with bean dip
I eat uno, dos, tres, quarto burritos
Pretty soon I can't fit in my Speedos
Well, I hope they feed us lots of chicken fajitas
And a pitcher of margaritas
Well, the combination plates all come with beans and rice
The taquitos here are very nice
Now I'm down on my knees, we need some extra tomatoes and cheese
And could you make that separate checks, please?
Taco... grande. Taco... grande
"Buenos noches, senor. bienvenido a el burritos casa de salsa. tenemos muchos platos muy sabrosos si puedo recomendar el ardiente pollo al infierno muy delicioso. sus ojos se quemaran, su estomago estara en fuego, se quedaran en el baño por una semana, entiendes lo que digo gringo estupido tonto?"
Well, the food is coming, I can hardly wait
Now watch your fingers, careful hot plate!
What you think you're doing with my chile con queso?
Well, if you want some, just say so
Oh boy, pico de gallo
They sure don't make it like this in Ohio
No gracias, yo quiero jalepeños, nada más
You can toss away the hot sauce
?Donde estan los nachos? Holy frijole!
You better get me a bowl of guacamole
Y Uusted, Eugene? Why's your face turning green?
Don't you like pinto beans?
You want some more cinnamon crispas?
If you don't, hasta la vista
Just take the rest home in a doggie bag if you wanna
You can finish it mañana
Well, it's been a pleasure, I can't eat no more
Señor, la cuenta, por favor
If you ain't tried real Mexican cooking, well, you oughta
Just don't drink the water |
