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Pastimes : Desire And Grief -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: HG who wrote (1183)	1/15/2003 4:25:12 PM
From: Sam Citron	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 1595

Grief w/o desire. Today I dutifully offered my 86 year old mother up to the surgeon for the removal of her rectal prolapse. Took her to the hospital, admitted her, took her to surgery pre-op where they undressed her, put her on a gurney and placed an IV tube in her arm. Finally the surgeon walked in and announced, "We can't operate today on your mother. She has not been cleared by cardiology." Nice of them to let me know. Now I am left to pick up the pieces. Mom feels she has lived too long. She has buried a husband and two subsequent lovers. She studied modern dance and taught physical education for 30 years. But now, her body is hunched over with osteoperosis and she can barely muster the strength to walk to the bathroom or the kitchen. She is ready to let go, but the rest of the world insists that she grin and bear it. Cold, cruel world.