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Pastimes : Clown-Free Zone... sorry, no clowns allowed -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: patron_anejo_por_favor who wrote (219099)	2/5/2003 8:11:15 PM
From: GrillSgt	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 436258

<<As expected, CSCO came in with its usual “beat by 2 pennies” earnings announcement, with the press release stating that pro-forma earnings were up excluding airball Internet investment writeoffs but including EPS jamming with stock repurchases and excluding stock options expenses but including 90% gross margins by selling previously written off inventories, etc. etc. Anybody tired of these “beat the street” earnings games? It’s really no different than those Los Angeles “Do Me At Lunch” blind dating agency introductions. “Mark, I would like you to meet Maria for lunch. She’s of average height, has a slender figure, and an athletic body.” Right away, with that introduction, I expected the worst. Another one of those average girls, a little too heavy, a little odd-shaped, and a little boring to talk to. When I finally met Maria, her appearance surprisingly “beat” the matchmaker’s estimates. She was actually somewhat attractive, thanks to some pro-forma adjustments: Conversation went well, excluding her unpredictable mood swings, but including the “pick me up” speedball she took two hours before our lunch date. Her breasts looked better than expected, including “special items” like extra padding in her Wonderbra pushup, and the cable knit sweater with the vertical lines to enhanced their appearance. Excluding, of course, the post-menstrual shrinkage which would inevitably happen in a few days. Her weight also beat estimates, including the crash bulimia Ex-lax diet she engaged in the night before, but excluding the regular periodic bouts of chocolate binging which has been accelerating with the ongoing bear market in her general attractiveness.>> capitalstool.com