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Pastimes : The Boxing Ring Revived -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: one_less who wrote (4539)	2/17/2003 3:47:48 PM
From: Lane3	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 7720

The doctors should have told you that. Yes, they should have offered that to him. I have real concerns about the care my father is getting. I don't know if it's the cheapo HMO or the general disregard for the elderly or something else, but, throughout his ordeal, my father kept bringing up the catheter and his swollen feet to all the doctors he saw and they kept dismissing his concerns to focus on what they thought was important. He never got a single provider to listen to him. I was all over his gatekeeper about his feet and the guy conceded a referral to a cardiologist, who dealt with the swelling, but it took nearly two months to get in to see the cardiologist. When you're pushing 90, two months is a long time. They don't seem to get that. One of the dilemmas I'm having is judging how much to assert myself. Dad clearly wants to take care of things himself and doesn't want me or anyone to fuss over him or to get between him and his doctors. But he doesn't know what questions to ask and he doesn't fully understand what's being said to him, at least he can't articulate it to me. So I was selective about when to insert myself in the process out of respect for his autonomy. But judging when I should and when I shouldn't is hard. It's even tricker now that I'm back across the country.