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Politics : DON'T START THE WAR -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: PartyTime who wrote (23316)	3/20/2003 12:54:43 PM
From: BubbaFred	Respond to of 25898

Degrees of separation - here is an old report. UNITED NATIONS - Secretary of State Colin Powell today offered incontrovertible proof of the long-sought-after link between Saddam Hussein's Regime and the al Qaeda Terrorist Network. In a speech before the General Assembly, General Powell was able to show, through a series of "degrees of separation," how Hussein was merely 6 people away from Osama bin Laden, leader of al Qaeda. Using charts, graphs, and all AV equipment available to the U.N., Powell presented his case to the General Assembly and the entire world, which was watching via television cameras. Never rambling or tentative, a confident Sec. Powell spoke with a voice of authority, outlining the solid connection between the leader of Iraq and the group of terrorists deemed "the most dangerous people to Humanity" by Fox News Network. The series of charts and graphs were presented in 14 different languages, including Farsi, Aramaic and German. French was inexplicably left out of the languages used. In sum, here are Gen. Powell's arguments: 1. In December of 2002, actor Sean Penn went to Baghdad, home of Saddam Hussein. 2. Sean Penn is married to actress Robin Wright Penn. 3. Robin Wright Penn made the movie "Forrest Gump" with Tom Hanks. 4. Tom Hanks made the film "Apollo 13" with Kevin Bacon. 5. Kevin Bacon made a Visa card commercial with Indian-born character actor Sahid Benjali. 6. Sahid Benjali used to bartend at the Lingerie Club in Hollywood. In the early 80's he served drinks to Carmen bin Laden, a former USC student, who is Osama's sister-in-law (estranged). After Gen. Powell's presentation, there were several heated discussions, with many of the delegates making angry responses, some of which were not too flattering to the case being made. "6 degrees? Fah!" said Ahmad Abul Gheit, the delegate from Egypt. "I can get from Saddam to Osama in 5 people! Including Madonna!" "5 people? I can do it in four," retorted Elinor Hammarskjold, the Swedish delegate. "And I don't need to use Kevin Bacon! Just give me the Farrelly Brothers and a pool boy in Bel-Air!" Where upon the entire floor of the U.N. erupted into arguments. Eventually the winner emerged: Tanzania delegate Mark J. Mwando was able to get from Saddam to Osama in 2: 1. In 1983, Saddam Hussein met with then U.S. Envoy Donald Rumsfeld, working on behalf of the Ronald Reagan-George Bush Sr. administration. 2. George Bush Sr. was formerly the head of the CIA, the organization which armed Osama bin Laden and provided training to his followers in the 80's. For coming up with the winning entry, Delegate Mwando was treated to a party platter from the Carnegie Deli on 7th Ave. "This is wonderful," Mwando said as he munched on a dill pickle. "I can feed half of Tanzania with this!" Sec. of Defense Donald Rumsfeld could not be reached for comment. However, director Peter Farrelly was reported as saying, "Far out."

To: PartyTime who wrote (23316)	3/21/2003 12:09:25 PM
From: Thomas M.	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 25898

the actual numbers are without a UN resolution only 54 percent support the war. That 54% is less than the number of people who believed Saddam masterminded the 9/11 attack (I am referencing a number from months ago, so it could have changed). Thus, even people who think Saddam has already attacked us believe that we should have gone through the UN!!! That is particularly remarkable considering that Americans are subject to a great deal of anti-UN sentiment from the media. Tom