To: Lou Weed who wrote (90935 ) 4/7/2003 1:33:57 PM From: michael97123 Respond to of 281500 Understood but Iraqi info nut may have different take on it. <G>command-post.org Op/ Ed for April 07, 2003 ---------------------------------------------------------------Command Post----------------- Iraq Info Minister: Invasion of US Going Well By The Right-Wing Piston Berkeley Liberated; Saddam Dating Britney Spears Cross-posted: Little Tiny Lies. Iraqi Information Minister Saeed al-Sahaf spoke to members of the press today, denying again that Iraq had been invaded and claiming that over the weekend, Iraq's Republican Guard had conquered the United States of America. In weeks past, al-Sahaf spoke to reporters from a podium in Iraq's Ministry of Information. Today, he spoke from behind a stack of feed sacks at his new "branch ministry," a hastily converted chicken coop behind the suburban home of his cousin Raheem. Said al-Sahaf, eyeing the sky warily for drones, "Our troops, who are so tricky they should be referred to as the whoopee cushions and exploding cigars of Allah, have landed on the infidel's shores and liberated millions of unwashed, pig-feet-sucking Americans." Al-Sahaf said Saddam's Republican Guard landed at Jones Beach, not far from Manhattan, and marched into the city, rescuing scores of falafel-cart operators who had recently been victims of severe verbal abuse. From Manhattan, Saddam's troops marched into Berkeley, freeing legions of fat dateless girls in prairie skirts. They then marched to President Bush's Crawford, Texas, ranch, where they short-sheeted the beds and made dozens of long-distance phone calls. Asked how the Iraqis had marched over 5,000 miles in a day, al-Sahaf turned to an aide and slapped him forcefully on the back of the head.