There Is Nothing More Important Than Honor
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By Jim Cava t r u t h o u t | Perspective Saturday 12 July 2003 truthout.org
The day was November 20, 1968 - OPERATION MEADE RIVER, South Viet Nam. In our military briefing the night before, we were told to expect a significant encounter with the enemy. In the early morning darkness my fellow Marines and I grimly boarded our transport choppers and before long each chopper lifted off one by one en route to the LZ (landing zone). To this day the last thing I can remember before getting shot down by the enemy was the loud roar of the chopper engines with the unmistakable sound of the chopper blades whirling round and round, the paradoxical scenic beauty of the peaceful countryside below, and my rosary in hand as I prayed.
As we approached the LZ the enemy opened fire. My chopper was the first to be hit. The pilot and co-pilot were killed instantly and the huge CH-46 went down, tumbled three times and exploded into a ball of fire. In a violently forceful instant, my life was transformed into a state of non-existence. Unconscious, I was pulled to safety from the burning chopper by a brave fellow Marine, and for hours I laid helpless in a rice paddy before a Medevac was able to assist and rescue. I was flown directly to U.S. Naval Support Activity (NSA), Da Nang for emergency medical treatment. The heartfelt gratitude and admiration that I hold for the skilled professionals of our Medical Service Corps in preserving my life remains everlasting.
Several days later I was flown to U.S. Naval Hospital, Guam, where I awoke from my comatose state. As I opened my eyes, my existing thought was one of thanksgiving; I was ALIVE. Insistently, I asked questions in a dire attempt to find out the status of my men, and what had actually happened to me. No one really knew. How could they? We came from two different worlds. Painstakingly I tried, but was never able to find out exactly what happened. What I did find out was that my left arm was severed above the elbow, my legs were crushed below the knees, my back was fractured in three places, I had received multiple scars, and I had contracted a staph infection that was causing hideous pustules to break out all over my body.
I was cut down without reprisal and it infuriated me to no end. The most significant undertaking of my life had been cut short and taken away from me. My job, one that meant more to me than anything, was now over. Realizing this, and that there was nothing I could do to alter the aimless course of the war evoked deep feelings of anger, frustration, and depression within me. I was overwhelmed with thoughts of Vietnam and how much I wanted to go back. I felt so damn distressfully helpless and useless. Yet as I thought of the immense human sacrifice given in suffering and in death by brave American men and women, in upholding and defending the principles for which we stand, I was filled with a profound sense of pride and consolation. I served my country with honor and my reward was immensely gratifying. I was now among that elite and distinguished group of patriotic Americans who served their country with honor.
It was that distinction of serving with honor that gave me a source of inner strength to deal with the anguish and pain, then and always, because honor is what it's all about. There is nothing more important than honor - It is everything. Adversely, I thought of the deplorable lack of honor on the part of our governmental and military leaders in successfully and expeditiously ending the war. A true miscarriage of trust was being perpetrated by the very American leadership I trusted in. My beloved and virtuous country was being disgraced and humiliated by a disloyal, dishonorable, self-serving, self-important and self-righteous group of power brokers and I was filled with a profound sense of disillusionment and betrayal - indignation and conflict. My country nor I would never be the same.
A week later, I was flown to Walson Army Hospital, Fort Dix, New Jersey. It was here that I received a most welcomed and compassionate visit from my father, mother and sister. I was transported to U.S. Naval Hospital, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania where I spent four months recuperating, and proficiently well trained in the use of an artificial arm. Finally, I was transferred to Veterans Hospital, East Orange, New Jersey where I spent two long depressing months and where I came close to a nervous breakdown but for the grace of God, I maintained and carried on.
Back in Nam, my friend and fellow Marine, Denny Leary, had yet to finish his tour of duty. In the meantime, Denny had written home to his family in Collingswood, New Jersey and told them about me. Thoughtfully, he asked them to visit me at the naval hospital in Philadelphia and to give me the royal treatment. I will never be able to express in words how thankful I am for their kindness and generosity. I did not know Denny before Nam but here we were thousands of miles from home, brought together by chance serving our country in what we thought was a justified war. Only to discover that it was one of deceit and dishonesty from the very start.
"The Incident" that brought America into the self-destructive and regrettable Vietnam War was a pretext. In August of 1964 the American people and Congress were led to believe that two U.S. destroyers, Maddox and Turner Joy, without provocation, were deliberately and aggressively attacked by North Vietnamese torpedo boats in the Gulf of Tonkin. This occurrence was a complete fabrication orchestrated by the egomaniacal President Johnson and his inner circle of collaborators to achieve their ultimate political ambition: Wage War.
And thus the stage of a dishonorable leadership was set. And honorable America and her honorable soldiers were forced into a war that should have never been. Although it was for just a brief moment in our lives, Denny and I developed a friendship. And it was something truly special and much appreciated, having to put our lives on the line in a war with no clear cut nor resolute direction. It was a good and reassuring feeling to know I had a friend and fellow patriot in this foreign land, in this ill-conceived and outrageous war, that I could believe and trust in. Our brotherhood brought a sense of stability to a no other than unstable situation. I would, and only could pray for his safe return.
But again, fate would not comply. It was April 27, 1969. I was at the Veterans Hospital when I received the shocking and distressing news. Denny had been killed. My good friend was dead. His precious life, one more precious life - wasted. I was numb. I felt as if life itself had been drained from me. I thought of the possibility that I could have saved Denny's life. I was so damn helpless. There were so many, too many good Americans suffering and dying. There were so many, too many loving American hearts broken and wrenched with pain. When will it/Will it ever end?
Again - A fabrication orchestrated by the egomaniacal President and his inner circle of collaborators to achieve their political ambition: Wage War.
Again - A deplorable lack of honor on the part of our governmental leaders.
Again - The stage of a dishonorable leadership is set.
Again - A miscarriage of trust perpetrated by the very American leadership we trust in.
Again - Honorable America and her Honorable Soldiers are forced into a war that should have never been.
Again - The suffering and death of our Honorable and Brave Patriotic Americans is looked upon as expedient and expendable in the eyes of the incompetent and morally deficient powermongers in control.
Again - Our beloved and virtuous country disgraced and humiliated by a disloyal, dishonorable, self-serving, self-important and self-righteous group of power brokers.
Again - Our great American heritage has been desecrated.
Again - Our American Spirit has been devitalized and demoralized.
Again - Amid the leadership of our great country, there's not one American with the strength of character to stand up, formidably and uncompromisingly, in defense of America's honor and demand an end be put to the sacrificial human offerings of so many good Americans.
Again - What we thought was a justified war was one of deceit and dishonesty from the very start.
Again - Lies, lies, lies.
Again - The purest and truest paradox: America is honorable but America's leadership is not.
Again - I am filled with a profound sense of disillusionment and betrayal, despair and degradation, indignation and conflict, infuriation and abhorrence. When will it end/Will it ever end?
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Jim Cava, retired Petty Officer of the United States Navy, is a Vietnam Veteran. He can be reached at j.cava@att.net |