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Politics : Sharks in the Septic Tank -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Lane3 who wrote (73271)	8/25/2003 6:24:04 PM
From: The Philosopher	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 82486

an insult is an insult. Tautologies don't help definitions. Just what do you think "not nice" means? "Not nice" is not a neutral condition. It is manifest in lots of ways including acts that are cruel and insulting. Not nice, and insulting, are two very different things. It's not nice to belch in public. But it's not cruel or insulting. It's not nice not to let somebody merge easily onto the freeway, but it's not cruel or insulting (though it migh tbe dangerous.) This discussion was about deliberately offending individuals, about insults. Those are not in the least identical to not nice. It's not nice of you to distort the things I say here. But I don't take that as an insult, or cruel, or anything other than that you don't take the time to read and respond carefully. The interchange with Jewel and me shows what can happen when people DO read carefully and respond on point. I really don't think you and I are that far apart. But I think we're being separated by different uses of language, and by overextending what the other person said and charging them with saying things that they didn't say. I have probably done that to you, despite my frequent attempts to clarify whether I understand you correctly. I know that you have done it to me. And I don't recall a single post in this discussion, though I may be forgetting one or two, where you neutrally asked me whether you were correctly understanding what I was trying to say. It would have been nice for you to have done that from time to time. And it would have avoided, I think, a lot of your anger at what you thought I was saying when I in fact wasn't.

To: Lane3 who wrote (73271)	8/25/2003 8:00:47 PM
From: TimF	Respond to of 82486

Just what do you think "not nice" means? "Not nice" is not a neutral condition. It is manifest in lots of ways including acts that are cruel and insulting. I think "not nice" is what your left over when you subtract anything that is nice. So in that sense it could be neutral. But you do have a point in that the term would not be used for most neutral things. I might however use it when someone had an obvious and easy chance to be nice but was cold or distant or oblivious and did not act nice when they had the chance but also did not act in a way that was deliberatly cruel or insulting, or would normally be considered an offense or insult. Tim