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Politics : Sharks in the Septic Tank -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: one_less who wrote (74482)	9/11/2003 5:50:59 PM
From: E	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 82486

I believe that story about your relative, and I think everyone's seen something like it. Isaac Bashevis Singer wrote "Children are the secrets in the hearts of their parents," and often, as in the case of your relative's children, it seems to be true. But children are their parents' genes, also. I'm sure that J has picked up much from his parents' behavior and unconsciously-given messages. But the gay business? No. Believe what you wish, and I think it is a matter of wishing, but if you'd seen J when he was a baby, and was two, and three, and four, and seen his parents in interaction with their baby, you'd know that was not their agenda. It's been a hard road for them. They live in the deep south. Doesn't make it any easier. Fortunately, they're academics. A more accepting environment than average, I think. The experience that would have convinced you beyond all doubt would be seeing all the children responding not to any "sexual identification," but to J himself... to their knowledge of their cousin... You don't buy glitter makeup and artificial nails for a "sexual identification," you buy what you know your cousin would want. I in fact attempted on one trip to the dollar store to influence gift-purchases, fearing that J would notice that his gifts were unlike those for the other boys. Or maybe just being...uncomfortable about it. Worried about the parents' reaction. Something. The children looked dismissively at me, as though to say, "You don't know J very well, do you?" and made their selections. Well, you'd know the kid was gay as gay can be, Jewel, if you knew him, and had known him as a baby, and knew his cousins. And you wouldn't "blame" the parents as you're doing by implication. They used to "blame" parents for autism, Jewel. Something to do with messages they were sending their child, you know.