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Politics : Don't Blame Me, I Voted For Kerry -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: American Spirit who wrote (26769)	5/29/2004 6:42:28 PM
From: Ann Corrigan	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 81568

Here's a gift. You need a good laugh. It's probably the result of hanging around those long-faced Kerry campaign posters more than you should be: REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE CONVENTION SCHEDULE 6:00 PM Opening Prayer - led by the Reverend Jerry Fallwell 6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance 6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd Amendment) 6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing 6:46 PM Seminar #1: "Getting Your Kid a Military Deferment" 7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong 7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries 7:40 PM EPA Address #1: "Mercury, It's What's for Dinner" 8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next 8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh 8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: "The Homos Are After Your Children" 8:30 PM Round table discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only) 8:50 PM Seminar #2 Corporations: "The Government of the Future" 9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man" 9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong 9:10 PM EPA Address #2 Trees: "The Real Cause of Forest Fires" 9:30 PM Break for secret meetings 10:00 PM Second prayer led by Cal Thomas 10:15 PM Lecture by Carl Rove: "Doublespeak Made Easy" 10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration: "How to squint and talk macho" 10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark "deer in headlights" stare 10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory kevlar chastity belt 10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black republicans 10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong 10:50 PM Seminar #3 Education: A Drain on Our nation's Economy 11:10 PM Hilary Clinton Piñata 11:20 PM Second Lecture by John Ashcroft: "Evolutionists – The Dangerous" 11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again 11:35 PM Blame Clinton 11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies 11:50 PM Closing Prayer - led by Jesus