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Politics : Don't Blame Me, I Voted For Kerry -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: stockman_scott who wrote (43132)	8/15/2004 8:59:57 AM
From: Andrew N. Cothran	Respond to of 81568

Michael Moore Purchases Rights to Kerry's DNC film. Michael Moore announced today that he had successfully negotiated the purchase of the reformating and reproduction rights to John Kerry's personally filmed accounts of his exploits during the Vietnam War. Moore says that he plans to add some additional footage that he is now in the process of filming, Kerry having agreed to return to the scene to reenact the many of the actual and factual events. His band of brothers, unfortunately now reduced to three because of desertion, have agreed to return to Cambodia with Kerry. The site of those scenes to be recreated are mostly in Cambodia, some in Phnom Phen, the capital, as guests of the ruling party. This is were the sex scenes will be reenacted. Moore has announced that his reprocessed and reproduced film will be renamed CAMBODIAN SEX, LIES AND VIDEOTAPE. Moore explains: We had to get Cambodia in just to clear up the record. And of course we had to include Sex in order to make sure that the film would have vast appeal to the unregistered and currently independent young voters who will flock to see the film and then will flock to the polls in November to elect their hero and the star of my new film as the next President of the United States. Moore also expressed his deep appreciation to George Soros for his deep pockets. Soros is one of the primary sources of funding for the new film. Moore explains: "George Soros has always been first to recognize a good speculative investment, especially those involving scalping others. After all, he made his fortune shorting the British Pound and then making sure it crashed so that he could cover with a ton of profit. I am glad to have Soros on my Board of Directors and I am sure that he will make another ton of money investing in my new film Cambodian Sex, Lies and Videotape." The film is expected to be released in late October. Moore explains: "This release date is designed to make sure that the Republicans will not have a chance to bad mouth my exquisite film and otherwise seek to undermine its essential, factual, and true message before the November vote." This press release comes to you courtesy of the: Al Franken DREDGING FOR DOLLARS AND OTHER STUFF Radio Network. (After all, we have to pay our bills in order to remain on the air, Franken explained.)