I wouldn't have volunteered this stuff, but since you asked.
Having FORCED you to list your many impressive educational accomplishments, you FORCE me to reply. I expect that you will learn the valuable lesson that you shouldn't assume that the person you're talking to on the internet cannot match and then exceed anything you can offer in self aggrandizement.
I want you to know that YOU'RE not the only one with achievements in the educational arena. Overcoming my personal modesty in the spirit of self-promotion, (we'd call that bragging if Kerry did it,) I must tell you that I was third in a sack race in a very big cub scout damboree and that I did pretty good in knot tying also! (Even my mom said I did although we all knew that I'd have done better but the scoutmasters kid got some kind of alumni-thing head start.) It was at that moment that I thought to myself, "hey, I'm good-reeeeeell good-I might be the kind of kid who can climb out of the life of labor that my dad leads and go to a Junior College.
It was a lofty goal, but then I'm not one to shrink from hard work, unless it really IS hard work and then I can shrink, or shirk, or whatever you want to call it, pretty damn good. Anyway, setting your sights high never hurt anyone-well it hurt someone I know with a gun that missed, but that don't count in education.
Some people fail to realize their dreams but I plodded and stumbled ahead and was accepted at my local JC after they checked for a pulse and, following a short debate, decided that I was the kind of guy who might make it there.
It was, by the way, one of the JCs that was nearly as good as some of the others. I studied next to Jim Webb; yes, THE Jim Webb who now works at safeway as a HEAD CLERK. One of my teachers was quite well known and, with luck, will one day get out of jail for that molestation thing.
I had a sterling 1.7 GPA for the first 1 1/2 years of my Junior College academic career before I entered post graduate studies majoring in diplomacy in Southeast Asia where I studied hard and graduated in only one year. My specialty was becoming virtually invisible so that diplomacy was not necessary since, to be honest, some of the Southeast Asians didn't seem all that diplomatic. It was during my diplomatic studies that I learned to swear in yet another language. (I don't like to brag, Mr. SIX languages, but I will say that I can swear pretty well in several languages myself.)
Although I had already reached the pinnacle of my dreams and aspirations, and my educational and career goals seemed in the bag, I went back to the same JC where I was welcomed with remarkable indifference. I had previously earned a sterling gpa in football and theory of fall sports, and I thought there might be some possibility of slight improvements in other areas of study. I was, once again, right, and I did especially well in theory of spring sports. Unfortunately, my performance dropped in pinnochle, drinking without throwing up much, and partying.
I did so well that I was encouraged to take that privileged step into the big time by JC employees who kept asking, "isn't there somewhere you can go," and so I entered my state's university system and, once again, graduated. (As you will note, at this point I was ahead of you with TWO degrees-AA and BA. I suspect that for all your BIG TALK, (sniff) YOU didn't get TWO degrees until you graduated Haaavaad grad school. Don't feel shamed at the comparison; I'm not trying to belittle your accomplishments here, I'm only pointing out that we're much alike, you and me.)
Overwhelmed with the success of having graduated AGAIN, (remember two degrees versus your one-two degrees versus your one-HA), I read the LSAT book from the library and signed up and took the test. Armed with a stellar 3.0 GPA and my 98th percentile LSAT score (they said it was a grading error but I used it anyway) I applied to law schools.
It seems that Yale and Harvard had something against me, or maybe it was that 1.7 early GPA, or more probably they didn't know I could swear in three languages or that I had a dual degree-AA AND BA, (I forgot to highlight that). And of course, unlike Kerry who YOU claim probably had some kind of "children of alumni" thing going as did our great scholarly president, Bush, I had no preferences. It's too bad because I hear the food was good there and they graded easy.
So I had to settle for attending a law school not among the top 10. Probably not even among the top 20, (but I did hear that some law schools were just as bad from a guy that was taking the bar exam for the 16th time-hey, that wasn't you, was it?)
I did graduate in three years WITHOUT studying very hard, and, although I'M not the HEAD anything, unlike my friend Jim Webb, (did I tell you he's the HEAD CLERK at Safeway Market?), I found someone to love me and give me children and I've never had to use my diplomatic skills again.
So when I say that I can't see why you'd say Kerry is "privileged" while Bush got a "superior" education to Kerry's, you ought to think it over. Remember, I have THREE degrees now.
By the way, if you'd graduated from a JC earning the highest degree offered by those institutions-an AA-Ha, (not too damn likely the way you maim the English language with a bunch of gibberish sounding foreign words), you'd understand that Harvard's in England, not the good ole USA. Too funny that YOU didn't even know that cause, hey, THREE degrees and you don't know that Harvard's in England-think about it-rowing?
Ed (AA Degree) |
