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Politics : Stockman Scott's Political Debate Porch -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: SiouxPal who wrote (60397)10/14/2004 8:41:34 AM
From: Ron  Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 89467
 
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF JOE CONSERVATIVE
Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with
water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is
clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal
fought for minimum water-quality standards.

With his first swallow of coffee, he takes his daily
medication. His medications are safe to take because
some stupid commie liberal fought to insure their
safety and that they work as advertised.
All but $10 of Joe's medications are paid for by his
employer's medical plan because some liberal union
workers fought their employers for paid medical
insurance - now Joe gets it too.

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is
safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought
for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo.
His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient
and its amount in the total contents because some
crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he
was putting on his body and how much it contained.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath.
The air he breathes is clean because some
environmentalist wacko liberal fought for laws to
stop industries from polluting our air.

He walks to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to
work. It saves him considerable money in parking and
transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal
fought for affordable public transportation, which
gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with
excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid
holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal
union members fought and died for these working standards.
Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's
employer doesn't want his employees to call the
union.

If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed,
he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment
check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should
lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.

Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so
he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally
insured by the FSLIC because some godless liberal
wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous
bankers who ruined the banking system before the
Great Depression.

Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage
and his below-market federal student loan because
some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the
government would be better off if he was educated and earned
more money over his lifetime.

After work this evening, Joe plans to visit his
father at his farm home in the country. He gets in
his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the
world because some America-hating liberal fought for
car safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood
home.

His was the third generation to
live in the house financed by Farmers' Home
Administration because bankers didn't want to make
rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until
some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it
didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.

Joe is happy to see his father, who is now retired
and lives on Social Security and a union pension
because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure
he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and
turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying
that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He
doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have
fought against every protection and benefit Joe
enjoys throughout his day.

Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government
liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a
self-made man who believes everyone should take care of
themselves, just like I have."