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To: Knighty Tin who wrote (513)	12/5/2004 4:06:06 PM
From: Proud_Infidel	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 873

Why on earth do we seek their approval? Explosives lost in airport gaffe By Allan Little BBC News, Paris news.bbc.co.uk The plastic explosives could be anywhere in the world, police say Plastic explosives were mistakenly loaded onto a plane at a Paris airport after security officials lost track of it during an exercise, police say. Around 150 grams (about five ounces) of explosive were slipped into the bag of a passenger during sniffer dog training at Paris Charles de Gaulle airport. The bag ended up on one of 90 flights leaving at the time, and police are now trying to track it down. They stress the explosive is "no more dangerous than a bar of chocolate". But airlines, airports and police forces around the world have been alerted. It was a routine exercise that went wrong. An embarrassment but not, French police insist, dangerous. The package of explosive was put in a bag at the airport on Friday to see if police dogs could detect it. Nasty surprise Someone though took their eye off the ball and the baggage handler unwittingly put the bag on a plane. Police say they do not know which plane the bag ended up on; about 90 flights were leaving the airport at the time. PLASTIC EXPLOSIVES Resembles putty and can be moulded by hand Best known is Semtex, designed in Czechoslovakia Made for landmine clearance and industrial work Was undetectable by dogs and airport security devices Became popular with international terrorists It could be on an internal flight in France, or be travelling as far away as the US, Japan and Brazil. Police insist the package of explosives is no more harmful than a chocolate bar - it has no detonator and does not react to movement, shock or even fire. But they do concede that somewhere in the world, one of the thousands of passengers who passed through the airport will get a nasty surprise when they open their luggage.

To: Knighty Tin who wrote (513)	1/11/2005 10:22:50 AM
From: Proud_Infidel	Respond to of 873

Message 20933309 THE LARK PROGRAM The White House 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, D.C. 20016 Dear Concerned Citizen: Thank you for your recent letter roundly criticizing our treatment of the Taliban and Al Qaeda detainees currently being held at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. Our administration takes these matters seriously, and your opinion was heard loud and clear here in Washington. You'll be pleased to learn that, thanks to the concerns of citizens like you, we are creating a new division of the Terrorist Retraining Program, to be called the "Liberals Accept Responsibility for Killers" program, or LARK for short. In accordance with the guidelines of this new program, we have decided to place one terrorist under your personal care. Your personal detainee has been selected and scheduled for transportation under heavily armed guard to your residence next Monday. Ali Mohammed Ahmed bin Mahmud (you can just call him Ahmed) is to be cared for pursuant to the standards you personally demanded in your letter of admonishment. It will likely be necessary for you to hire some assistant caretakers. We will conduct weekly inspections, in conjunction with the Red Cross, to ensure that your care for Ahmed is commensurate with international standards and those you so strongly recommended in your letter. Although Ahmed is a sociopath, extremely violent, and was trying to kill at least 20 women and children as we captured him, we hope that your sensitivity to what you described as his "attitudinal problem" will help him overcome these character flaws. I might add that he will bite you, or worse, given the chance. However, perhaps you are correct in describing these problems as mere cultural differences. We understand that you plan to offer counseling and home schooling. Your adopted terrorist is extremely proficient in hand-to-hand combat and can extinguish human life with such simple items as a pencil or nail clippers. We do not suggest that you ask him to demonstrate these skills at your next yoga group. He is also expert at making a wide variety of explosive devices from common household products, so you may wish to keep those items locked up, unless (in your opinion) this might offend him. Ahmed will not wish to interact with your wife or daughters (except sexually) since he views females as a subhuman form of property. This is a particularly sensitive subject for him, and he has been known to show violent tendencies around women who fail to comply with the new dress code that Ahmed will recommend as more appropriate attire. I'm sure they will come to enjoy the anonymity offered by the bhurka - over time. Just remind them that it is all part of "respecting his culture and his religious beliefs" - wasn't that how you put it? Thanks again for your letter. We truly appreciate it when folks like you, who know so much, keep us informed of the proper way to do our job.You take good care of Ahmed - and remember...we'll be watching. Good Luck! Cordially, Pres. Geo. W. Bush CC: Donald Rumsfeld