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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: DScottD who wrote (67418)	3/20/2005 9:12:52 AM
From: Rambi	Respond to of 71178

It hasn't been 4 years already, has it? With your new name I keep forgetting that we have a very long shared DAR history and you "knew them when". Ionesco and I sometimes marvel at the fact that her firstborn is now the same age that CW was when we met here. I only have to look at my checkbook to know that that four years is definitely accounted for. So it's with sadness, but huge financial relief, that we will see Ammo graduate in two months. Not that he has a clue how he's going to pay his bills at that point. He's pretty worried. Well, as concerned as Ammo gets, which isn't very. But I sprang to maternal attention when he said to me this week, "How do you know if you're having panic attacks?" "Why?" I said, immediately the concerned mom. Of course, he SHOULD be having panic attacks. He is about to be an unemployed actor in LA. But we didn't think he'd noticed. "I think I had one," he replied. "If you had one, you would know," I assured him. "You think you are dying. Your heart races, you feel sick, you sweat, you shake. The whole world closes in on you." I start worrying about health insurance. I was just going to take out a catastrophic policy after he graduated. It probably won't cover counseling and prozac. He nods. "Tell me, honey. It's ok. We'll get help." CW, who can have hysterics over a late fee at the library, is now listening intently, ready to assist in case all this self-revelation sends Ammo into another seizure right this moment. "I woke up at 3 am one night and thought, oh shit. What am I gonna do after I graduate." We wait expectantly, but the story seems to be over. "That was it?" CW gears up to tell how he had fourteen nervous breakdowns during his first college exams, all in one night. "Well, yeah. It was 3 am. I went back to sleep," Ammo obviously feels he is disappointing us. "I think my heart was beating faster than normal, though." I pat his shoulder. "We'll get through this together, don't worry." "I'm here for you, bro," says CW, and rolls his eyes at me. It was so good to see the whites of his eyes again, after all these years. Like old times.