To: koan who wrote (35552 ) 3/11/2007 7:50:22 PM From: marcos Read Replies (4) | Respond to of 78417 'All evidence for evolution was planted by the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The FSM tests Pastafarians' faith by making things look older than they are (q.v. Omphalos). "For example, a scientist may perform a carbon-dating process on an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the Carbon-14 has decayed by electron emission to Nitrogen-14, and infers that this artifact is approximately 11,000 years old, as the half-life of Carbon-14 appears to be 5,730 years. But what our scientist does not realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage. We have numerous texts that describe in detail how that can be possible and the reasons why He does this. He is of course invisible and can pass through normal matter with ease." The Pastafarian belief of heaven stresses two points. "A) It has beer volcanos as far as the eye can see & B) It has a stripper factory."[6] The religious text of the Pastafarian religion is called the Loose Canon. In place of the ten commandments, it contains eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts", with a looser moral code. Controversial reports regarding the creed's position on nickel , to wit that another be put in the jukebox, remain unconfirmed at this time. "RAmen" is the official conclusion to prayers, certain sections of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and so on, and is a portmanteau of the Semitic term "Amen" (used in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) and Ramen, a noodle. While it is typically spelled with both a capital "R" and "A", it is also acceptable to spell it with only a capital R. Pirates and global warming Chart comparing Number of Pirates versus Global Warming; an example of the fact that correlation does not equal causation. According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians. Their image as "thieves and outcasts" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the Middle Ages. Pastafarianism says that they were in fact "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who distributed candy to small children. The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Henderson's original letter to the Kansas School Board. It illustrated that correlation does not equal causation. Henderson put forth the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s."[6] A chart accompanying the letter shows that as the number of pirates decreased, global temperatures increased; this is a farcical demonstration of how statistically significant correlations do not imply a causal relationship.'en.wikipedia.org Credit to J Chris P for performing his sunday devotion on an appropriate thread - Message 23358699