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To: Sonki who wrote (12553)	10/30/1997 4:28:00 PM
From: Ann Janssen	Respond to of 27012

Sonki, Heres a little song that may get a chuckle especially the programmer types. Ann Come and Listen to a story 'bout a man named Jed, A poor college kid, barely kept his family fed, But then one day he was takin' to a recruiter, Who said. "they pay big bucks if ya work on a computer...." Windows, that is...PC's...workstations... Well, the first thing ya know ol' Jed's an Engineer the kinfolk said "Jed, move away from here". They said "California is the place ya oughta be". So he bought some donuts and he moved to Silicon Valley... Intel, that is...Pentium...big amusement park.... On his first day at work, they stuck him in a cube. Fed him more donuts and sat him at a tube. They said "your project's late, but we know just what to do. Instead of 40 hours, we'll work you 52!" OT, that is...unpaid....mandatory... The weeks rolled by and things were looking bad. Schedules started slipping and some managers were mad. They called another meeting and decided on a fix. The answer was simple..."We'll work him sixty-six!" Tired, that is...stressed out...no social life... Months turned to years and his hair was turning grey. Jed worked very hard while his life slipped away. Waiting to retire when he turned 64, Instead he got a call and escorted out the door. Laid off, that is...de-briefed...unemployed... Now the moral of the story is listen to what you're told, Companies will use you and discard you when you're old. So gather up your friends and start your own firm. Beat the competition, watch the bosses squirm Millionaires, that is...Bill Gates....Steve Jobs... Ya'll come back now...ya hear'

To: Sonki who wrote (12553)	10/30/1997 4:32:00 PM
From: Ann Janssen	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 27012

Sonki, Here's a great one!! Even applies to investing. Took me a while to find it, now I've had about 30 laughs. Warning - Tad off color. Take Care - Ann A little old lady walked into the main branch of the Chase Manhattan Bank holding a large paper bag in her hand. She told the young man at the window that she wished to take the 3 million dollars that she had in the bag and open an account with the bank. But first, she said that she wished to meet the president of the bank due to the rather large amount of money involved. After looking into the bag and seeing bundles of $1,000 dollar bills which could have easily amounted to $3 million dollars, he called the president's office and saw to it that the old lady met with him. The lady was escorted upstairs and ushered into the president's office. Introductions were made and she stated that she liked to know the people that she did business with on a more personal level. The president then asked her how she came into such a large amount of money. "Was it inheritance?" he asked. "No," she replied. He was quiet for a minute trying to think where she could have come into $3 million. "I bet," she stated. "You bet!" repeated the president. "As in horses?" "No," she replied, "I bet on people." Seeing his confusion, she explained that she just bets on different things with different people. All of a sudden she said, "I'll bet you $25,000 that by 10:00 am tomorrow your balls will be square." The bank president thought for a minute, then figured that she must be off of her rocker. He decided to take her up on the bet. He didn't see how he could lose. For the rest of the day he was very careful. He decided to stay home that evening and take no chances - there was $25,000 at stake. When he got up in the morning and took his shower, he checked to make sure that everything was OK. There was no difference; he looked the same as he always had. He went to work and waited for the little old lady to come in at 10:00, humming as he went. He knew that this would be a good day -- how often do you get handed $25,000 for doing nothing? At 10:00 am sharp, the little old lady was escorted into his office. With her was a younger man. When the president inquired as to the purpose for him being there, she informed him that he was her lawyer and that she always took him along when there was a large amount of money involved. "Well," she asked, "what about our bet?" "I don't know how to tell you this," he replied, "but I'm the same as I've always been, only $25,000 richer!" The lady seemed to accept this, but requested that she be able to see for herself. The president thought that this was reasonable and dropped his trousers. She instructed him to bend over, then she grabbed hold of him and checked for herself. Sure enough, everything was fine. The president then looked up and saw her lawyer banging his head against the wall. "What's wrong with him?" the bank president asked. "Oh him," she replied. "I bet him $100,000 that by 10:00 this morning I would have the president of Chase Manhattan Bank by the balls."