To: Cogito Ergo Sum who wrote (94075 ) 8/29/2012 6:47:09 PM From: bart13 3 Recommendations Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 218074 An oldie: A Menu of Religious and Philosophical Options Taoism: Shit Happens. Confucianism: Confucius says, "Shit Happens". Buddhism: If shit happens, it isn't really shit. Zen: What is the sound of shit happening? Hinduism: This shit happened before. Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah. Protestantism: Let shit happen to someone else. Catholicism: If shit happens, you deserved it. Judaism: Why does shit always happen to us? New Age: It is not shit, and it is not happening. Christian Science: Shit does not happen. Mormonism: You must study your ancestral shit. Sufism: Shit Whirls. Baha'i: Shit is one. Hare Krishna: "Shit happens, Shit happens, happens, happens, shit, shit." Jehovah's Witness: Shit is coming. Vedanta: Shit is an illusion. Paganism: The gods are shit. Shamanism: Shit is fertilizer. Atheism: No shit! EST: I acknowledge my shit, and it's okay. Existentialism: So, Shit happens. Agnosticism: Maybe there is shit, maybe not. Marxism: We have nothing to lose but our shit. Humanists: We shit, therefore we are. Cynics: We doubt shit. Stoics: We accept shit. Epicureanism: Ignore shit, be happy. Cannibalism: Eat shit. Freemasonry: We know shit, you don't. Voodoo: We interpret shit. Capitalism: Shit has a price. Wicca: Mom's giving me shit. Oral Roberts: Send me money or shit will happen. Heisenberg: Shit may happen and it may not. National Rifle Association: Shit doesn't happen, people do. NAACP: Shit is a terrible thing to waste. Jerry Falwell" "#*#$ happens" N.O.W. : Men are shit. Rastafarianism: This is good shit. Scientology: If shit happens, find your misunderstood word.