A few at a time...
H.M.S. PINAFORE
We sail the market waves,
In our Winspear ship, a beauty,
We were sure she would sail fine,
But instead she lost our booty
When our balls whistle free
O'er the bright blue sea,
We know someone's kicked us - a knave?
But at anchor we find
We were dumb and blind
'Twas our own officers so brave
IT'S A HARD RAINS A GONNA FALL
Oh where have you been, my blue eyed son,
And where have you been my shareholder one,
I've stumbled after owning mega shares of Winspear,
I've walked and I've crawled on one crooked highway,
I've stepped in the middle of a Board of Directors,
I've been out in front of some burned out stockholders,
I've been 10,000 miles in the mouth of some shysters,
And it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard,
It's a hard rains a gonna fall
Oh what did you see, my blue eyed son,
And what did you see my shareholder one,
I saw some stockholders with wild wolves all around them,
I saw green clay with diamonds and nobody on it,
I saw a stock price with blood that was dripping,
I saw a room full of directors with hammers a bleedin',
I saw many people with portfolios under water,
I saw folks all complainin' whose tongues were all broken,
I saw guns and sharp swords in the hands of pissed people,
And it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard,
It's a hard rains a gonna fall
Oh what did you hear, my blue eyed son,
And what did you hear my shareholder one,
I heard the sound of a thunder that roared out a warnin',
I heard one hundred drummers whose hands were a bleedin',
I heard many people talkin' I heard nobody listnin',
I heard one thousand people screwed,I heard a few people laughin',
I heard songs of a poet who was robbed in the gutter,
I heard the sound of a clown who was mugged in the alley,
And it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard,
It's a hard rains a gonna fall
Oh who did you meet, my blue eyed son,
And who did you meet my shareholder one,
I met some directors with four million options,
I met a white man who walked many dogs,
I met some shareholders whose anger was burning,
I met some old threadsters who gave me a rainbow,
I met one man who was wounded by greed,
I met another man who was wounded by cash grabs,
And it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard,
It's a hard rains a gonna fall
Oh what shall you do now, my blue eyed son,
And what shall you do now, my shareholder one,
I'm going back out 'fore the directors all screw us,
I'll walk to the depths of the deepest class action,
Where plaintiffs are many and the directors defendants,
Where the pellets of options are poisoning the stock price,
And the gems in the tundra meet the dark dirty secrets,
Where the faces of thieves are always well hidden,
Where avarice is ugly, where shareholders are forgotten
Where green is the color and greed is the number,
And I'll tell it and speak it and think it and breathe it,
And reflect to the thread so that all souls can see it,
And I'll find a reporter to write an expose piece,
And I'll know my rights well before I start suing,
And it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard,
It's a hard rains a gonna fall
OL' TOMATO, THE REBEL
Ol' Tomato, was a rebel,
He roamed through the West,
Ol' Tomato, the rebel,
He wandered alone
He was a fightin' fruit, who gave a hoot,
Where the only law was the stacked deck draw,
From the bottom of the deck of the Board of Dreck,
He fought 'em, Ol' Tomato
Ol' Tomato was a rebel,
He did what was right,
Ol' Tomato, the rebel,
Didn't run from a fight,
He got hoppin' mad, that rebel lad,
And he wouldn't take shit from no Winspear twit,
And he sought some redress from the Board and the press,
The rebel, Ol' Tomato
THE BATTLE OF NEW ORLEANS REVISITED (for Bearcatbob)
In winter '97 now we took a little trip,
Along with Randy Turner on the mighty Winspear ship,
We spent a lot of money and we bought a lot of stock,
And we went along to Snap Lake where the Arctic drillers flock
They turned their drills and the granite kept a comin'
There wasn't quite as much there as there was a while ago,
They turned some more and kimberlite came comin'
Showin' us some diamonds that should make us all some dough
The market nixed us, they thought results were punk,
They tanked our lovely Winspear down till its stock price was junk,
And just when folks were smartin most and prices looked their worst,
Ol' Randy and his buddys said, "We're gonna get our's first"
They polled their board and the options came a comin'
They weren't as quite as pricey as they were some months ago,
They screwed us all and they just kept a hummin'
That if we don't much like it we can sell our stock and go
We read the news release and got a little mad,
Chatted on the internet and said Randy's a cad,
We started plottin' strategy and made ol' Randy curse,
And when this all is over this big scam will be reversed
At Lakefield Labs, the caustic fusion's comin'
They'll tell us pretty soon if diamond counts are very high,
And if it looks like things are economic,
You better all just get a grip cause Winspear's stock will fly |
