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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Jack Clarke who wrote (6370)	1/18/1998 8:50:00 PM
From: Rambi	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

We've been arguing all afternoon about smoker's rights at Feelings. (Not me. I never argue.) I'm pretty much against the courts invading lives. On the other hand, (and people who know me here have heard this already)as an old social service worker, I see no reason for us to support a woman who continues to propogate while on welfare. She has a choice. Get it fixed or don't ask for assistance. And don't tell me you have a God-given right to have children and I can't stop you-which is what I was told angrily, self-righteously, and repeatedly. Also after deinstitutionalization in the 70's, there were many minimally functional adults released into communities. I placed an 18 year old girl with an IQ of about 75 who just flat out loved sex-would happily engage with anyone or anything. And the court wouldn't let us tie her tubes-she wasn't considered smart enough to understand what she'd be agreeting to. Is there logic in that? So we what? Let her have a baby? Insane.

To: Jack Clarke who wrote (6370)	1/19/1998 10:24:00 AM
From: Rambi	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

The biggest problem with swim meets is that they go on forever. Sat. there were 20 schools-430 swimmers--it started at 8 in the morning and ended at 9 that night. And since a swimmer is usually only entered in 3 or 4 events, including relays, there's a lot of down time! And for parents, it's endless. We usually read a lot and try to catch up on each other's thoughts! Your statement about our loved and apreciated children needing to learn that they are not the center of everyone's universe, is absolutely true and I think is the crux of what I found upsetting in the basketball father's story. Something I've noticed out here in Yuppieland is an obsession on the part of a lot of parents with their own children's abilities, lives, accomplishments, intelligence, and very little interest in anyone else's lives or children. I've had the experience of listening for HOURS to someone (at games or swim meets) and then sitting next to them the next week and they don't even realize that I'm the same person. I never existed for them, except as a body to talk to about themselves and their children. And this is very frustrating because my children and my life are so superior to theirs.