To: Mike M2 who wrote (1155 ) 3/9/1998 2:36:00 AM From: Mitch Blevins Read Replies (1) | Respond to
JUMPER AND PETE M. HOST A RADIO SHOW...Contrary to popular opinion, DipsterTalk(tm) is still on the air. Our two heroes are still towing the line, providing support for all the Dipsters in America... PETE M.: Hello, this is Pete <g>JUMPER: and this is Jumper.PETE M.: and welcome to DipsterTalk(tm), a show where we allow Dipsters to continue their delusions by showing them that they are not alone. <-g->JUMPER: Tonight we have on our show Eddie, a retired game warden from Victoria, Texas.... and Mike, a free-lance Mall Santa and a drifter. Both are very active in the stock market and are here to offer their insights. Welcome to the show, guys.MIKE: Thanks, Jumper. ho ho ho.EDDIE: Thank you. Didn't you say we were going to have refreshments on the show. I was told there would be refreshments.PETE M. We have sodas in the machine around the corner. Would you like one? <g>EDDIE: No beer?PETE M.: I'm sorry, but the FCC regulations state that...EDDIE: Never mind, I brought my own. (reaches into his jacket and pulls out a Shiner Bock) . You want one?PETE M.: I usually don't during the early morning show.<g>JUMPER: Mike, why don't we start off with you. What do you see for the market this week?MIKE: Jumper, much like a good rodeo, I think we are going to see some tough love for the bulls this week. ho ho ho.JUMPER: And you, Eddie?EDDIE: Do you have a bottle opener?PETE M.: Why don't we take some calls. Caller #1, you're on the air. Are you a dipster(tm)? <g>CALLER#1: You bet I am, Pete. I love your show. I don't care if you do make that funny noise with your throat.PETE M.: Thank you, caller. Do you have a question for our panel?CALLER#1: Yes I do, Pete. Did any of you take advantage of that fantastic dip-buying opportunity on Thursday?JUMPER: Mike, why don't you take this one.MIKE: Listen, caller. Thursday was just the start of what is going to be a big helping of unlubricated tough-love for the bulls. Mark my words. ho ho ho.CALLER#1: Jumper?JUMPER: Yes, caller.CALLER#1: I find your guest panelist very disturbing.PETE M.: My apologies, caller. We didn't have much time for screening this week. Me and Jumper took a vacation to Las Vegas.<g>JUMPER: Why don't we take another call. Caller#2, you're on the air, are you a dipster(tm)?CALLER#2: I refuse to be labelled.JUMPER: Okay... do you have a question for our panel?CALLER#2: Yes, I do. Which stocks will show the biggest gains this week. And what should I bid for them to get the lowest possible price?PETE M.: Eddie, why don't you take this one.<g>EDDIE: Glad to, Pete (hic). Caller, if I knew the answer to your question, I would be a rich man.CALLER#2: I find your response devoid of any ideas I can address.PETE M.: I think what Eddie is trying to say, is that the price movements of individual stocks are extremely difficult to predict, because they are influenced by a large number of factors which are beyond our ability to monitor or control. <g>CALLER#2: Just answer the question, Myth-boy. Or admit that you are intellectually inferior, and incabable of answering. And stop making that disgusting <g> sound!EDDIE: Well, I didn't want to say anything, but that noise is kind of freaking me out, Pete.MIKE: Ho ho ho.JUMPER: Do I know you, caller?CALLER#2: Again, you are avoiding the question. Perhaps if your brain were not so feeble, you could address the queries that I lay before you. I am going to have to ask that you don't call me here again.PETE M.: But... you called us. <g>EDDIE: (finishing off his beer) That does it. I'm leaving! Pete with his funny noises and not a beer in the house. Anybody know the way to the nearest bar?JUMPER: There's O'Shanahan's down the street, but I don't think they open until 8am.CALLER#2: Heellloooo. I'm waiting for one of you dolts to answer my question.PETE M.: I'm sorry, caller. But I'm afraid we are out of time until next week. Thank you for listening to DipsterTalk(tm). I'm Pete, signing off.<g>JUMPER: and I'm Jumper. We'd like to thank our special guest who is still here, Mike.MIKE: ho ho ho.JUMPER: Tune in next week, for more peer support to help you pour your money into the market.end CALLER#2: Hello?exchange2000.com exchange2000.com exchange2000.com exchange2000.com exchange2000.com exchange2000.com
