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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Father Terrence who wrote (18270)	3/13/1998 11:48:00 AM
From: Kid Rock	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 108807

(snipped from somwhere else) Why did the chicken cross the road? TEACHER: To get to the other side. PLATO: For the greater good. ARISTOTLE: It is in the nature of chickens to cross roads. KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability. TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take. ANDERSON CONSULTING: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening it's dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Anderson Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking it's physical distribution strategy and implementation process. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Anderson helped the chicken use it's skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chickens people, processes and technology in support of it's overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Anderson Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it. RONALD REAGAN: I forget. CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before. NEIL ARMSTRONG: One small step for chickens crossing the road and one giant leap for chickens everywhere LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken 'crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep him down. MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question. MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and he said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing. JESUS: Suffer the little chickens to cross the road and come unto me. FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road for you to believe it? RICHARD M. NIXON: Let me make this perfectly clear. The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken DID NOT cross the road. MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Intent is unimportant. The end of achieving the other side justifies the means of crossing.. NIETZSCHE: Chicken is dead. JERRY S1EINFELD: Why does anyone cross the road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was the chicken doing wandering around all over the place anyway?" FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity. BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000 (with integrated Internet Seed Explorer), which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. STEVE JOBS: We invented the chicken. BORIS YELTSIN: No! WE invented the chicken. OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who is crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing? DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are genetically disposed to cross roads. EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference. BUDDHA: Asking the question denies your own chicken nature. JOHN F. KENNEDY: Ask not what the chicken can do for you but rather what you can do for the chicken. RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road... it transcended it. ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain. COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one? BILL CLINTON: I never had any sexual relationship or any other relationship with chickens who crossed the road or didn't cross the road. Now I have to get back to the business of running the country. Monica, can you stay a minute? INVESTMENT BANK: First, what's our fee? KENNETH STARR: I plan to subpoena the chicken and get to the bottom of this. DENNIS MILLER: Who gives a ----!...