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Pastimes : FLAME THREAD - Post all obnoxious/derogatory comments here -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Blue On Black who wrote (3974)	4/9/1998 8:05:00 PM
From: Larry Voyles	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 12754

I left the market directionless yesterday. Never fear, I will return tomorrow to drive the market in amazing new directions. I was busy performing my annual tax preparation rite from sunup until way past midnight. This rite has become highly evolved and complex over the years. It starts right after the previous year's tax ritual with chants of "I WILL do my taxes early next year". The actual ritual involves digging through piles of receipts, symbolizing the search for inner truth. The rite also demands that the participant scream "Where did I put that damn FILE?" over and over, symbolizing the externalization of our fears of the unknown. And LOTS of cursing. The cursing is the most important part. If you cannot curse proficiently, succinctly and with great venom, the Tax Gods become displeased and cause all your W-2s and 1099s to instantly teleport into the bottom drawer of your youngest child's dresser. Massive sacrifices of beer and wine please the Gods of Creative Accounting, with obvious benefits. I actually finished my taxes early this year. I usually like to participate in the the annual midnight high-speed race to the post-office-on-the-other-side-of-town-that's-still-open.