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Microcap & Penny Stocks : DGIV -- Good Prospects? -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: MARK C. who wrote (3417)	4/11/1998 11:58:00 PM
From: X Y Zebra	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 7703

>>X Y ZEBRA: If my mentioning the word Catholic in my joke offended you I am truly sorry. But if it was anything other than that you seriously need to get out into the real world more often. JMHO MARK C.<< The word catholic, nor anything else, did not offend me. Therefore, no need for your apology. In my opinion, I simply did not like the joke, that is all. So, that leaves me with the question: Where in the real world, should I seriously go out to? (your opinion). I guess all this time I must have been living in a hologram. (or may be it is Virtual Reality, yes, that's it...) As for jokes: Here are some, so you can criticize me as well: ------------ # 1. When Albert Einstein died, he met three guys in the queue outside the Pearly Gates. To pass the time, he asked what were their IQs. The first replied 190. "Wonderful," exclaimed Einstein. "We can discuss the contribution made by Ernest Rutherford to atomic physics and my theory of general relativity". The second answered 150. "Good," said Einstein. "I look forward to discussing the role of New Zealand's nuclear-free legislation in the quest for world peace". The third guy mumbled 50. Einstein paused, and then asked, "So what is your forecast for the Dow?" ------------------- # 2. An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, " Ah, you're an engineer, you're in the wrong place". So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy. One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?" Satan replies, "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake. He should never have gotten down there; send him up here." Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him." God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue." Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?" ------ # 3. The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried over time (weight-lifters, longshoremen, etc.) but nobody could do it. One day this scrawny little man came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a tiny squeaky voice "I'd like to try the bet." After the laughter had died down, the bartender said OK, grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man. But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the $1000, and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight-lifter, what?" The man replied, "I work for the IRS." -----------end. O.K. flame away.... Z.