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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: jhild who wrote (10774)	5/25/1998 10:29:00 PM
From: Rambi	Respond to of 71178

Extension of this directions thing: Someone left me directions the other day and I was reading them to Dan. They were terrible ! Meaningless things like GO SOUTH ON 121, THEN EAST ON.... What does that mean, I said to Dan. Which way's South? Does that mean I go toward the Outlet Mall or toward Six Flags? Said Dan, That's not 121. that's 360. Don't take 360. Stay on 121! You mean head toward the hospital? No-that's 114. Go south on 121-- What's SOUTH, dammit! Turn right at Tinseltown. But then don't get on 360, stay on 121. You mean head toward the parking lot where CW took Driver's Ed and not your office? Right! Then turn east on --- Wait wait!~-Do I go past the Burger Street or turn at the Emergency Clinic I took Ammo to when he had pneumonia that time? Who gave you these directions? Chuck wrote them out for Jan. Call Jan again and get HER to give you directions. So I do--and when I get off the phone I am disgusted. All Chuck or Dan would have had to say is that it was right next to the Indian restaurant we all went to a few months ago.

To: jhild who wrote (10774)	5/26/1998 3:05:00 PM
From: Lady Lurksalot	Respond to of 71178

jhild, I'll let you in on one of my best kept secrets. Some of my friends call me Patrick Henry because I know no north, no south, no east. nor west, and am loathe to stop and ask directions, preferring to cruise around until I see something that looks as though it might be a good place to make a turn. I have elevated the U-turn to a high artform. I have been known to make U-turns on bridges and in tunnels. However, I have occasionally been known to give in to conventional wisdom and stop at a gas station to buy a map. I am able to follow a map with a remarkably high degree of proficiency. I have learned from anecdotal information that there is not one employee in any gas station anywhere (at least, in California) who is able or willing to give even local directions. including directions to the nearest freeway onramp. So, we agree. Stopping at a gas station to ask for directions is just another pointless exercise in futility. Holly