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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: epicure who wrote (23345)	7/8/1998 2:31:00 PM
From: Grainne	Respond to of 108807

Being shuttled back and forth is very confusing for children, I would imagine. In fact, while it sounded like a good idea at the time it started happening a lot, with joint custody agreements, I have also read articles suggesting that children should stay in one place, with parents shuttling back and forth instead. I like that idea! I think that children need a lot of stability, and they certainly don't get it in most blended families. It seems like it is the adults whose lives should reflect all the changes more than those of the children, if we expect the children to recover from their broken experiences and do well later in life. I imagine it is difficult for children to really respect parents who have made a total disaster of things. Also, the parents are often trying to buy their children's love, by offering bigger and better goodies, particularly in the case of parents who do not have custody. This makes it very difficult sometimes for the custodial parent, who as you say ends up being the disciplinarian as well, and competing for love and popularity with bribes doesn't teach very much about developing good values, either.