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Strategies & Market Trends : Point and Figure Charting -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Al Serrao who wrote (4798)	7/16/1998 1:42:00 PM
From: Ms. X	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 34810

In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes & you get points. Do something she dislikes & points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the point system. Simple Duties ------------------ You make the bed..............................................+1 You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows.....0 You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets...................-1 You leave the toilet seat up..................................-5 You replace the toilet-paper roll when it's empty..............0 When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex...-1 When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom.....................-2 You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light pantyliners with wings.........................................................+5 But return with beer..........................................-5 You check out a suspicious noise at night......................0 You check out a suspicious noise and it's nothing..............0 You check out a suspicious noise and it's something...........+5 You pummel it with a six iron................................+10 It's her father..............................................-10 Social Engagements --------------------------- You stay by her side the entire party........................0 You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy......................................-2 Named Tiffany...............................................-4 Tiffany is a dancer.........................................-6 Tiffany has implants........................................-8 When mingling, you hold your mate's hand and gaze at her lovingly.....................................+1 When mingling, you introduce her as "the ol' ball and chain"and pat her on the rump.....................................-5 When your mate points toward a hot-looking woman and asks you if you think she is attractive, you say,"Yes, but nowhere near as attractive as you"..........+1 That woman is her sister......................-90 Saturday Afternoon -------------------------- You go to the mall together..................................+3 You go to the mall, drop her off at the entrance, then park the car................................+4 You go to the mall, drop her off at the entrance, then drive to a sports bar..........-2 You spend the day shopping for furniture and pretend to like it....................................+3 You spend the day shopping for furniture, and nap on a sectional.......................................0 You spend the day at a wholesale club, buying in bulk .......+3 Most of it chips and beer ...................................-6 You tackle a large household project, such as painting the den....................................+15 Or refinishing the floors...................................+16 Or rewiring the basement....................................+17 Or adding a second floor....................................+18 Or setting up a Nerf Ball hoop over the bathroom wastebasket..........................-6 And you're tickled pink about it............................-15 You visit her parents..........................................0 You visit her parents and actually make conversation ........+3 You visit her parents and stare vacantly at the television ..-3 And the television is off....................................-6 You spend the afternoon watching college football in your underwear...............................-6 And you didn't even go to college...........................-10 And it's not your underwear.................................-15 Her Birthday ----------------- You take her out to dinner....................................0 You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar.........+1 Okay, it is a sports bar.....................................-2 And it's all-you-can-eat night...............................-3 It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team.................-10 You go to a nice, pricey restaurant & hire a guitar player...+3 You go to a pricey restaurant, hire a guitar player and get up and sing..................................................+4 If you stink.................................................+2 If you're not half bad.......................................+5 You get up and sing a Barry Manilow song, and you're escorted out to much applause............-2 You give her a gift...........................................0 You give her a gift and it's a small appliance..............-10 You give her a gift and it's not a small appliance ..........+1 You give her a gift, and it isn't chocolate..................+2 You give her a gift that you'll be paying off for months....+30 You wait until the last minute and buy her a gift that day..-10 With her credit card..........................................-30 And whatever you bought is two sizes too big................-40 Thoughtfulness -------------------- You forget her birthday completely..........................-20 You forget your anniversary..................................-30 You forget to pick her up at the bus station................-45 Which is in Newark, New Jersey..............................-50 And the pouring rain dissolves her leg cast.................-60 A Night Out With The Boys ------------------------------------ Go out with a pal ..........................................-5 And the pal is happily married .............................-4 Or frighteningly single ....................................-7 And he drives a Mustang....................................-10 With a personalized license plate (GR8 N BED)..............-15 You have a few beers........................................-9 And miss curfew by an hour.................................-12 You miss curfew by an hour and you didn't call.............-20 You get home at 3 am.......................................-30 You get home at 3 am smelling of booze and cheap cigars....-40 And not wearing any pants..................................-50 Is that a tattoo??.........................................-200 Her Night Out ------------------- You stay home while she goes out with her annoying friend from work..............+5 She goes out with her annoying work friends, and she comes home late...................+10 You wait up.................................................+15 She goes out, comes home late and drunk, and you put her to bed.................................+20 A Night At Home ---------------------- You watch TV together........................................ 0 You rent a movie.............................................+2 You rent a movie and it's SENSE & SENSIBILITY................+3 It's SENSE & SENSIBILITY and you stay awake throughout.......+5 It's SENSE & SENSIBILITY and you fall asleep.................-1 It's SENSE & SENSIBILITY and you fall asleep and drool.......-2 A Night Out ---------------- You take her to a movie.......................................+2 You take her to a movie she likes............................+4 You take her to a movie you hate ............................+6 You take her to a movie you like.............................-2 It's called DeathCop 3.......................................-3 Which features cyborgs having sex............................-9 You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans.......-15 Flowers ---------- You buy her flowers only when it's expected................... 0 You buy her flowers as a surprise, just for the hell of it...+20 You give her wildflowers you've actually picked yourself.....+30 And she contracts Lyme disease...............................-25 Your Physique -------------------- You develop a noticeable potbelly............................-15 You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it....................................................+10 You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeansand baggy Hawaiian shirts......................................-5 Finances ------------ You spend a lot of money on something impractical............-5 Something she can't use......................................-10 Such a a motorized model airplane............................-20 And she got a small appliance for her birthday...............-40 Driving --------- You lost the directions on a trip.............................-4 You lost the directions and end up getting lost...............-10 You end up getting lost in a bad part of town.................-15 You get lost in a bad part of town and meet the locals up close and personal............................................-25 You know them.................................................-60 The Big Question ----------------------- She asks, "Do I look fat?"....................................-5 (Sensitive questions always start with a deficit) You hesitate in responding....................................-10 You reply, "Where?"............................................-35 Communication --------------------- When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression.........................0 When she wants to talk, you listen, for over 30 minutes.......+5 You listen for more than 30 min. without looking at the TV...+10 She realizes this is because you've fallen asleep............-20