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Pastimes : Religion on SI -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Emile Vidrine who wrote (16)8/16/1998 7:13:00 PM
From: Don Pueblo  Respond to of 1542
 
Your tricks won't work on me, Emile. I know who you are.



To: Emile Vidrine who wrote (16)8/16/1998 8:07:00 PM
From: Don Pueblo  Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 1542
 
OK, I'll tell you my real name:

You can't say it in English, but the closest you can come is

Bawk Bawk Bawk Bawk.

My home planet is in what we call the Garndarf system, the star you humanoids call "Rigel", which is in your "Orion constellation". It's about 900 light years away. We are a race of large flying reptiles, similar in appearance to a Japanese monster you call "Rodan". I don't mean to brag, but we kick ass. I don't mean that in a bad way.

I live in an interstellar spacecraft that is in orbit around your planet. We are on a peaceful scientific mission.

Regarding religion; it is not high on our priority list. We have a very firm rule on the subject: let people find their own way. But, since you seem to be interested in the subject, our planet went through this religious turmoil your planet is experiencing about 9,000 years ago. It is well documented in our history books.

What we found, and I am oversimplifying it for you, is the dogma was secondary, and the words and deeds were primary. Ancient history records several prophets of what we may call "The Supreme One". We found that over time, these prophets were sometimes misunderstood, and conflict resulted in the interpretation of their teachings, (aka "dogma").

At one point, a Very Bad Lizard named Oooof came to power. The details are irrelevant. He caused a lot of death and destruction, almost half the population of the entire planet perished. It is known in our history books as "The Really Bad Times". Oooof was a really smart lizard. He claimed he was good, and he supported the major religion on our planet, but then he proceeded to exterminate all the other religions! What a character! "Have a seat in the airlock, we'll be right with you." if you get my drift.

A small faction of citizens formed an "underground" army on one of our moons to battle Oooof. This took several hundred years. They spent all their time developing what you call "extrasensory perception". Once that was developed, things changed, and there was "The Really Nasty War". Oooof and all his minions were vanquished, (they were criminals and had no perception) and new laws were made.

Our basic law is very similar to one you have here on Earth, "Do unto the other giant lizard what you would have that giant lizard do unto you." But the best part is that we can all "read minds". Not the way you see it in your Hollywood movies, it's more like the way a lizard will run if you think about trying to grab it or kill it. You know what I'm talking about, right?

We can sense it when someone has what we call a "No-No Thought." It basically means you want to hurt someone else because they don't agree with you. Sounds simple, right? It actually is.

Nothing necessarily wrong with that, we all think those things every so often. We had to build some fail-safes so that the "No-No Thoughts" didn't turn into "No-No Actions." That's what we wanted to avoid.

So, we made some rules based on our own moral codes. Ours are not the same as yours, by the way, and that's another thing we don't get into with alien races. On your planet, you have a whole bunch of different moral codes; what is good in France is bad in Saudi Arabia, and so on. That is your business, (as long as you don't start shooting).

We also found that there were a few "No-Nos" that just would not get with the program. For some odd reason, they refused to see that there might be more than one way to look at the future of the universe. They would usually accuse other lizards of what they were guilty of themselves. Once we figured that out, the rest was easy.

We made a little vacation spot for them about 300 light years away, and sent them all over. Then we gave them all laser rifles, and they killed each other because they could not agree who was right.

Any more questions?

TLC



To: Emile Vidrine who wrote (16)8/18/1998 2:53:00 PM
From: SIer formerly known as Joe B.  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 1542
 
Free Your Mind And Your Ass Will Follow

Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within
(x3)
Open up your funky mind and you can fly
Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within

Freedom is free of the need to be free

Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within
(x4)
Yeah

Free your mind and your ass will follow (your ass will follow)
The kingdom of heaven is within
Whoaaaaa!
Free your mind (will you free your mind?)
And your ass will follow (and your ass will follow)
I have never, never never
Never in my life
Have this given to me

Free your mind and your ass will follow
?
Not like you
You are as free as you want to be (your ass will follow)

Well, I discovered that this life that was gettin' to me
Is not really mine (Free your mind and your ass will follow)
If it were mine, I would have fun all of the time
I'm very disgruntled now
Now, I want a way out, now
I have to find a way
I have to find some way out
Free your mind and your ass will follow (x2)

Give it up, give it up (free your mind and your ass will follow)
Give it up and give it to me, baby

I'm calling you love
Love
?from my heart

Free your mind and your ass will follow

Wowww!
?

Free your mind and your ass will follow (x2)
The kingdom of heaven is within
Free your mind and your ass will follow (x3)

Get it on!
Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within
Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within (x5)

The kingdom of heaven is within (free your mind!)
The kingdom of heaven is within (free your mind yawf)
The kingdom of heaven is within (x6)

The kingdom of heaven is within (are you satisfied?)
(x4)
The kingdom of heaven is within
(I wanna know! Free your mind and your ass will follow)
The kingdom of heaven is within (I Really care)
The kingdom of heaven is within (x2)

The kingdom of heaven is within
I'm so confused about it all (x2)
I'm so confused about the whole thing
I don't understand
I don't understand nothin'
I don't know what I feel
I can't feel me, I can't live me, I can't be me
My mind, it does not belong to me
I'm so confused (x2)
I can't hear myself
I can't hear myself calling for help
I can't free my mind
So my ass can't follow
Someone help me
I got to get help
Here's my arm
Help me escape
I don't want to (x3)
I can't free my mind
No, no, no
They won't free me
I can't run
I can't get out
I can't free my mind (x3)
I'm so mixed up
So mixed up
What time is it? (x3)

Resurrection, free of charge
I can't hear me (x2)
Free your mind and your ass will follow
I can't
Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within (x4)
Free your mind and your ass will follow

(George Clinton And The Funkadelics)



To: Emile Vidrine who wrote (16)8/20/1998 11:48:00 PM
From: nycnpbbkr  Respond to of 1542
 
Emile, what would you think if;
A White Southern President ordered a Jewish Senator to order a Black general, to order it's WASP & Black army, to go to Africa & Afghanistan, to kill a Saudi and his Islamic terrorists known as the International Islamic Front for the Jihad against Jews and Crusaders."

You figure this would be a good thing or a bad thing, I can't tell?