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Pastimes : Jokes -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Monty Lenard who wrote (598)9/17/1998 10:40:00 AM
From: treetopflier  Respond to of 2733
 
Handcuffs

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want - and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozin, and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules.
Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night - whether you're here or not."



To: Monty Lenard who wrote (598)9/18/1998 12:36:00 PM
From: Monty Lenard  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 2733
 
Five of our Presidents, Ford, Reagan, Carter, Nixon and Clinton were on
a ship that hit an iceberg.
Ford screamed, "What should we do?"
Reagan said, "Man the lifeboats!"
Carter said, "Women and children first!"
Nixon said, "Screw the women and children."
Clinton said, "Do you think we have time?"


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