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Politics : Bill Clinton Scandal - SANITY CHECK -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Borzou Daragahi who wrote (10653)10/22/1998 11:07:00 AM
From: jbe  Respond to of 67261
 
Okay - TIME OUT, ALL! TIME FOR A LAUGH OR TWO...

Do you ever get the feeling that you have "heard it all before"? That you have "seen it all before"? That "plus ca change,plus c'est la meme chose"? That this particular argument is not going anywhere?

Are we, in fact, going round and round and round and round?

Then you may appreciate this piece on the Nobel Peace Prize awards, which has been edited for publication on a pure family bulletin board like ours:
















The Nobel Peace Prize was awarded, today, to the guy who beat the <bleep> out of
the guy who always used to say, 'Yeah, but PIECE OF WHAT?!!!'" whenever
anybody else said, "Nobel Peace Prize."

"That <bleep>," said this year's Nobel Peace Prize recipient, Garth Register Jr,
in his Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech, "had some <bleepin'> nerve sayin'
'Yeah, but PIECE OF WHAT???!!' whenever anybody else said 'Nobel Piece
Prize.'"

The Nobel Peace Prize is awarded each
year to whoever punches out the most
people for saying something bad about
the Nobel Peace Prize, like, for example,
how it's awarded each year to whoever
punches out the most people for saying
something bad about the Nobel Peace
Prize like, for example, how it's awarded
each year to whoever punches out the
most people for saying something bad
about the Nobel Peace Prize -- and so on,
recursively.

According to reporters who attended the Peace Prize acceptance ceremony, a
nervous silence fell over the room following Register's acceptance speech, as
everyone suddenly started nervously scratching a place that didn't itch, or
picking at a scab that didn't exist, or suddenly became totally engrossed in a
breaking news story broadcast by a pirate station on a tiny TV set hidden deep
under their fingernail, best viewed by staring at the fingertip, head-on, barely
breathing or making a sound, for hours on end.

"We interrupt this breaking news story," said the anchor of the pirate news
show on the TV in everybody's fingernail, "to bring you a story that hasn't
changed one...iota since the beginning of time!"

But before he could say what it was, he was interrupted by a news story that
hadn't changed one.....iota since before the beginning of time.

Eventually, and before the new news story could be revealed for what it was, it
was interrupted by an even more important news story about something that
hadn't changed one.....iota since before the beginning of even "before"
itself. And so on, recursively, for awhile, until suddenly, years later, they
somehow managed to return to their regularly scheduled programming.

Unfortunately, however, their regularly scheduled programming was still last
year's World Series which had never ended.

Apparently, according to Walter Cronkite, they had gotten to the 7th and
deciding game of the World Series, and the score was tied 3-3 at the end of
regulation play, so they had to go into extra innings. But when the tie still
couldn't be broken, no matter what, rather than just stop play after 30 innings
and let the victory fall to some unknown law beyond the laws of Nature, that
night, they just stubbornly kept going and the players and fans and umps and
coaches just started working round-the-clock, in shifts.

Soon, however, according to CNN, they had to start hiring many more new
players and coaches and fans and broadcasters and general managers, and
the World Series became an employment black hole, gradually sucking in all
personnel, everywhere.

Eventually there stopped being anyone left to work in the factories where they
put the little frozen dinners into their little boxes and there stopped being
truckers to deliver them to the nearby store, because they all had to go work to
keep the World Series going, and that's why I have to stop here now and go out
and catch some field mice or lizards for breakfast...

Of course the rhetorical question, "Piece of what?!!" remains unanswered and
will, no doubt, have to wait for resolution until the next event at a level higher
than the level of the individual cosmos, or at least until the re-boot or re-start of
"until" itself, or maybe even 'till the re-boot or re-start of "itself" itself.


c3f.com