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Pastimes : Jokes -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: The Rabbit who wrote (848)11/4/1998 3:29:00 PM
From: treetopflier  Respond to of 2733
 
YOU MAY BE A REDNECK IF....

You think Genitalia is an Italian airline....

You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.....

Last year you hid Easter eggs under cow pies.....

You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws....

You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night....

Jack Daniels makes your list of "Most Admired People."....

You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean....

Anyone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this!"....

Your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She got to readin'....

You think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader....

Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan....

You go to your family reunion looking for a date....

You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines."...

You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.....

The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.....

You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.....

The blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.....

You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.....

Yor dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.....

You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.....

Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart cause there's a law agin' it.....

You dated your daddy's current wife in high school. ...

You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.....

Yer father executes the "pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.....

Yer toilet paper has page numbers on it.