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Pastimes : Ask God -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Darrin Vernier who wrote (21703)	11/9/1998 6:46:00 AM
From: Sam Ferguson	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 39621

Sorry, guess I was just not sure of your thoughts. It is difficult for me to know my level of understanding and with others sometimes easy and at times impossible. I just thought you could be in the denial stage of what you know is truth but Ego is still battling it full force. The hardest part to overcome in Christian Ego is the self evaluation as worthless. The church has brainwashed many of us with this thought and it was very difficult for me to overcome. I wasn't sure (are you?) that you wrestling with the Angel in this respect had been accomplished. I'm reasonably sure you are at a level where you understand that at each stage of development it becomes more difficult to reach the next one. Surrendering the Ego to Christ is never immediate like most think it is. Most conceive as I did that when Christ is experienced a miracle changes the Ego immediately shedding it from all responsibility for self. Would that were possible. That is when you have to carry your own cross to the crucifixion of Ego, and unlike the bible story, there is no one to help you bear the weight of that cross. It must be borne by you alone.