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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Skipper who wrote (26092)	11/22/1998 11:00:00 PM
From: Grainne	Respond to of 108807

<My oldest is 20, and he is still developing. Our society has made 18 a magic number, but you need to think beyond that. I don't believe that our teaching comes to fruition for many years after. Be patient, above everything. Think back to those who were patient with you, and ask yourself if they are not the ones who had the greatest influence.> You're really right about children developing at their own pace, Skipper. I was really very immature well for my age when I was young. Certainly going away to college at eighteen wasn't right for me, and I had a lot of problems because I was so immature. But some teenagers really are ready then. It's too bad the societal categories are so strict. For example, why should all sixteen-year-olds drive? It certainly isn't that way in all societies, and the number of serious accidents among the youngest drivers is exponentially greater than for older teens. You are right about remembering the people who were patient with me. I'm not sure they had more of an active influence, but certainly they were the only ones I kept talking to regularly, and I think young people without sounding boards can easily go off the deep end. I keep reminding myself that what my daughter becomes needs to make her happy, not me (although I keep my fingers crossed that she wants to have children). I have an acquaintance whose daughter graduated from a wonderful and extremely expensive college and became a teacher for some sort of charitable enterprise, where she makes so little money that she has to grow her own food and dry all of her laundry on a rack and cut every other corner. But her daughter is on a spiritual path which includes simplicity and saving the earth's resources, so that is fulfilling and perfectly gratifying for her. Her mother struggles to understand it, however. A little volunteering can go a long way! Along those lines, my husband saw bumper sticker that said "Live simply, so that others may simply live." I think I will slap that one up next to "My other car is a broom" and go for a spin.