SI
SI
discoversearch

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor.  We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community.  If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.
Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Ish who wrote (15507)12/17/1998 2:51:00 PM
From: Michael Sphar  Read Replies (4) | Respond to of 71178
 
Hey waht's this ADD stuff ? I need somethin to explain this messy desk that I work at, and why I don't like filing things.<g>



To: Ish who wrote (15507)12/17/1998 3:01:00 PM
From: Gauguin  Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 71178
 
(ADD) >>>> He'd put my Queen in jeopardy and I'd think I'll do this and this going out 5 moves. Trouble was I'd start with move 5 and lose my Queen.<<<<

Can relate. A good plan goes whacky. We must appear incredibly stupid to some.

But I had a period of lucid thinking, willful thinking, calm clear thinking, that lasted a couple of days or maybe hours when I first began one of the ADD counter-actors. I forget the name, naturally.

Somehow my physiology immediately adapted to it, and the ADD re-appeared.

But that was possibly the best time of my life. And believe me, I was brilliant. Not that it mattered; it was the pure enjoyment of sequential, willful thinking. Of access to all tools at command, by choice. I felt like a painter, able to choose. Power, power, power. What bliss. To intersperse it with moments of calm, not-thinking. By choice. My god, such a thrill. Holy cow, man.

If that is how my brain would be, and I felt it was, have always had that inkling or suspicion, ~ if that's a normal brain I want it. Still, and full. Sensing, sensible. Satisfied. Corrective, imaginative, not overwhelmed. The state alone, calm alone, was so satisfying I regard it as the highest state attainable.

Seemed to flop into it a couple times in the ancient past, under certain conditions. It was so cool it would make me laugh. A hard, personal, satisfied-gut laugh. Because that layer, calm-me-more, is under there, but I can't experience it that way. Not by any means or effort I know. And it's a very interesting, fulfilling, neat me.

I thought that without the ADD overlay and input, my creative composite would change; lessen. That's some of the folklore. For me, it was the opposite. Everything was enhanced, fell more politely and clearly into place, like perfect sequential tumblers. A flow of thought or idea from beginning, to end, and running nowhere else involuntarily.

The degree of effort and exertion was reduced so much, it was like a car leveling out or peaking a hill it had been running against all its life.

Heavy fuel, mon. Just a clear, calm, (brilliant, to me, but who cares) rested and capable feeling and feel-able head.

Not craving experience, having it. Experiencing. Sustaining feelings for more than synaptic microseconds. Calm.

heh heh heh. No one believes these things; they are too incredible and personal/subjective, I think. And hey, everybody's got problems.

But I would shake the ADD. I want what's under the rug.



To: Ish who wrote (15507)12/17/1998 3:12:00 PM
From: Gauguin  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 71178
 
It's that calming effect, that drives ADD-ers to alcohol. The window to more complete thoughts and sensations, that slowing down allows. Small bits of un-interrupted focus and experience.