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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Gauguin who wrote (15830)	12/25/1998 8:33:00 PM
From: Don Pueblo	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 71178

OK, we took Pop-Pop (grandpa) to his favorite Chinese Restaurant for dinner tonight. We go there about twice a year. About 30 years ago, he had the major hots for the owner of the restaurant, Mimi, who looks the same, it appears, as she did 30 years ago. Pop-Pop cannot make the same statement. I get a kick out of him because he is retired from the U.S. Postal Service, and he does nothing but watch TV all day and all night. So I don't have to watch any TV, he just fills me in on it. He likes pro wrestling, he thinks it is real. No kidding. He is not demented, he's just 75 years old, and he thinks all TV is real. He's a crusty old dude, but a good man, wounded at Guadalcanal in the Marine Corps. He fills me in on the Big Matches. He never remembers the wrestler's names, but he describes them, and then describes the matches, as if they were real. It cracks me up. In between this, he is grumbling about how good Mimi looks. She taunts him, because he orders Black Russians at 6.50 a pop-pop. Three of those, and he gets pretty amusing. I ordered Sweet and Sour Pork, just because I never eat meat, and when I do, it ain't pork. And it has this sauce that is like 20% Red #1 dye, and 30% Pure Cane Sugar, and I picture a couple of dudes in Chinatown up in NYC mixing up a big vat of this stuff and tossing it into gallon cans with "Chong Lo Sweet and Sour Goo for Killing White Devils " stickers pasted on the side, and shipping it all over the east coast. Pop-Pop's fortune, BTW, was, "You will have a new romantic relationship." He reads it and says, "Yeah, right. With who? That's what the fortune should be telling me." Anyway, Luke, age 3, is Very Interested in my Sweet and Sour Pork, since he knows what sweet is, and last week snagged some "sour" gummy worms by mistake so he knows what "sour" is. But he was not interested enough to actually eat the pork. Which should be a clue for me. But that's another story. So, we exit the restaurant, which Luke calls the Thighneeth Wethwand. He sees a stray cat in the parking lot and says, "Hey dad! Thweet and Thouwah kitty cat!" and laughs his ass off.