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Biotech / Medical : PFE (Pfizer) How high will it go? -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Ibexx who wrote (6692)	1/13/1999 9:45:00 PM
From: BigKNY3	Read Replies (4) \| Respond to of 9523

Save me! I'm a victim of Viagra Ruthie Blum 01/12/99 The Jerusalem Post Page 10 Dear Ruthie, I suppose I should, by all criteria, be overjoyed at the arrival of Viagra on the marketplace. But I am not happy at all! My husband (now retired) and I were happily married for about 30 years until this monster of a drug invaded our lives. With nothing more important on his brain, my Mister now sits at the computer all day, downloading pornographic clips from the Internet. Then, when I return home from work, he doesn't even give me a chance for a snack before putting theory into boisterous practice. This has become our daily routine, and I am very irritated by it - both literally and figuratively. Should I dare rebuff him, he would surely take it as an insult and (God forbid) perhaps seek another woman as an outlet for his Viagra - fueled adventures. Even more important, I love this guy - even if he invariably insists that he lacks the energy to shop, wash dishes or take out garbage! I have confided my problem to only one person, my hairdresser. But the only response she offered was, "Oy! It should only happen to me!" Have you any advice? Victim of Viagra , Somewhere in Galilee Dear Viagra Victim, It sounds to me as though you are doing everything with your husband but telling him how you feel. Afraid that he will perceive any displeasure on your part as a rebuff and immediately run out and look for a substitute, you head for the beauty salon in order to have someone to whom you can voice your complaints. What you must ask yourself honestly is why - if you "love this guy" - you find it so difficult to share your physical, as well as emotional, discomfort with him. Consider the possibility that the fact that he has retired, while you are still an active member of the workforce, has created tensions in your marriage that have nothing to do with sex. The tone of your letter suggests that you view your "Mister" with no small amount of contempt. Describing the man you love as someone who doesn't have anything "important on his brain" is a strong indication of this. So, too, is your pointing out that he offers no help around the house. These may be the outward expressions of a deeper anger over your husband's being housebound altogether. In fact, for all you know, his newfound fixation on Internet pornography and his drug-assisted sexuality may have something to do with his own feelings of anger at being stuck at home. However, instead of admitting to him (or even, perhaps, to yourself) that the shift in roles at this stage in your lives may be taking its toll, you blame Viagra and cyberspace for putting a damper on your 30-year marriage. This is not to say that the "irritation" caused by your partner's daily pouncing is not genuine in and of itself - just that neither pharmaceuticals nor computers can be held responsible for the actions of the people who use them. If you want things to change, you'll have to take the bull by the horns, so to speak, and conduct a different kind of session from the one that awaits you daily at the door. Your husband can and should take responsibility for anything he does that affects the person with whom he shares bed and board. There is no law that says he has to pop erection pills on a daily basis, any more than there is one that says you have to accommodate him every time he does. Letters should be addressed to: 'Dear Ruthie,' POB 81, Jerusalem 91000. For e-mail: ruthie@jpost.co.il ('Dear Ruthie' also appears in In Jerusalem and in City Lights on Fridays.)