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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: James R. Barrett who wrote (30434)	2/7/1999 9:49:00 PM
From: nihil	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 108807

Strange that you should ask. I have written none except the manual of my life -- a work in progress - toward the last chapter I would say. What a nice thing to say that I write like a girl. I've always had trouble expressing my female side, never been able to snuggle in the hay with a girlfriend without something coming up that marked me as a male and an aggressor who could turn an intimate moment with a friend into a contest where she had to push me off less I force myself on her. I've studied (watched Discovery Channel, rather) males and females of many different species. Watch teams of male dolphins rape a female in Australia. Watched whales court and mate. Watch birds, and chimps, and many differ kinds engage -- males display and then force and penetrate. The male squid inserts a spermatophore with a special tentacle into the females mantle, in some speciies even cuts her flesh to deposit his sperm. A male tiger bites his mate and draws copious blood and has a hook on his penis that keep him inside of her until the sperm passes. And they mate several times a day, and the female is like drugged with his force and power and submits joyfully it seems to his brutal sex. All sex, except in some lower forms, where the male lives as a parasite in his mate, seems a male forcing a female to bear his offspring -- seems he must fight away the other males (like crashing his skull into mountain sheep, so the only the hardest headed male gets to mate). I don't want to fight other rugged males anymore. I'm much too old and weak to often win or even to survive the exercise. I've left more than my even share of sperm within women, and the kids have gamboled off and are no longer my concern. I think I'd be content to lay me with some old unfertile woman, with my head upon her naked lap and dream of what our youger love might have been. Occasionally when up to it trying to pretend but having even rehearsals if not performances. There other kinds of love besides fierce forcing I believe, and hope.