To: JWC who wrote (17104 ) 2/14/1999 6:35:00 PM From: David M. Boerman Respond to of 44908
OT******** Here is a story a friend of mine emailed to me, if this doesn't get you laughing out loud nothing will. -----Original Message----- >>> >> Subject: If you can't laugh about this, you need help >>> >>> This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless to say >>> the help desk employee was fired; however, the person is currently >>> suing the WordPerfect organization for "termination without cause". >>> >>> This is from the taped conversation leading up to dismissal: >>> >>> "WordPerfect Technical Desk, may I help you?" >>> "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect." >>> "What sort of trouble?" >>> "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went >>> away." >>> "Went away?" >>> "They disappeared." >>> "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" >>> "Nothing." >>> "Nothing?" >>> "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type." >>> "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" >>> "How do I tell?" >>> "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" >>> "What's a sea-prompt?" >>> "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?" >>> "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type!" >>> "Does your monitor have a power indicator?" >>> "What's a monitor?" >>> "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it >>> have little light that tells you when it's on?" >>> "I don't know." >>> "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power >>> cord goes into it. Can you see that?" >>> "Yes, I think so." >>> "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into >>> the wall." >>> ".......Yes, it is." >>> "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two >>> cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?" >>> "No." >>> "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the >>> other cable." >>> "....... Okay, here it is." >>> "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back >>> of your computer." >>> "I can't reach." >>> "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?" >>> "No." >>> "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?" >>> "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's >>> dark." >>> "Dark?" >>> "Yes -the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in >>> from the window." >>> "Well, turn on the office light then." >>> "I can't." >>> "No? Why not?" >>> "Because there's a power outage." >>> "A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do >>> you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer >>> came in?" >>> "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet." >>> "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like >>> it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it >>> from." >>> "Really? Is it that bad?" >>> "Yes, I'm afraid it is." >>> "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?" >>> "Tell them you're too fucking stupid to own a computer."