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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: epicure who wrote (32133)	3/7/1999 3:43:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Respond to of 108807

X, I know what you mean in this posting and yet my experience has been quite different. I have found women friends to be very nurturing and empathetic, but I have found men friends to be equally nurturing and empathetic. When I have been heartbroken, my male friends have held me emotionally with a delicacy and tenderness that seem to be familiar to many women as coming only from other women. I find it strange and confusing that my experience seems unusual. When I was the victim of a date rape during college, it was a male friend who pulled me out of the depression into which I was sliding. My women friends were very caring, but none of them could (or dared to?) touch immediately the sick feeling that this horror had something to do with me as a person and as a desirable woman; he did with great warmth and reassurance. Possibly because I have so rarely gone through the dating ritual, I have not felt the pressure to play the female role vis-a-vis some man. Most of my lovers have been friends before, during, and after our sexual relationships. On the other hand, for many of my lovers, I seem to be a rarity--an alien or a mutant, as one termed me. I have a matching sex drive and I understand how men think because it is a part of how I think. Is this the difference? BTW, if my husband made a snide comment about lesbians when I was talking about enjoying the company of other women, I should certainly let him have it right upside the head with those camping trips!

To: epicure who wrote (32133)	3/8/1999 1:24:00 AM
From: Grainne	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 108807

X, you totally lost me when you said maybe you should wear woollens. It does seem that Greer is not the only woman writing about the seeming emptiness of feminist values, particularly its freedoms, however. I would like to read this book, because I have seen its author on television talking head programs and find her interesting. I also wonder if the review totally accurately reflects her thoughts and ideas--the interviewer seems slightly hostile. I found it provocative because this is a young woman who has just been through a late nineties American college experience. I know there was a lot of promiscuity when I went to college as well, a lot of eating disorders, mental health problems, etc. The author makes an interesting point about the value of a woman's modesty in attracting a mate (although her immaturity may have caused her to go off the deep end in some of her other statements, which are not totally logical, according to the reviewer). Did this rash of problems start with the feminist movement? I wonder what college life was like in earlier decades. sfgate.com