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To: Tom C who wrote (3767)3/9/1999 4:46:00 PM
From: Josef Svejk  Respond to of 4295
 
192.41.19.35



To: Tom C who wrote (3767)3/9/1999 4:50:00 PM
From: Hoatzin  Read Replies (4) | Respond to of 4295
 
Tuesday March 9, 8:01 am Eastern Time

Company Press Release

FBN Comments on Recent Share Price

MISSINGMOOLAH, Ontario--(BUSINESS WIRE)--March 9, 1999--FBN Associates Inc. (By Appointment:FBNA - news) today stated that they can think of absolutely no reason for the recent lack of movement in the company's share price, no, really, stop laughing, we're not kidding.

William Jefferson Pinocchio, the company's assistant deputy chief executive officer, made the statement, noting that since January 1, the company has discussed possible contracts with potential clients with a theoretical value in excess of $1 million. Each of these discussions has been been announced in way which ought to have made the stock go up.

Pinocchio noted that the company continues to write press releases suggesting imminent contracts with companies looking not only for Y2K solutions, but for client server migrations, and groupware solutions as well. In addition, the company recently issued a 4-page brochure for self-assessment of embedded system Y2K risks.

With quivering lower lip, Pinocchio added, "I want you to listen to me. We have no plans to issue any more shares at this time while I speak. Or at this time right now. I realize that we have filed to sell millions of warrants, convertible at prices far below the current stock price. But that does not mean that all those shares will actually be issued. Trust me on this one."

FBN is a software development company with the next generation of software for large stock promotion schemes. The I|Pumpa System is enterprise promotion software which allows any enterprise to promote their shares. The old method of "recommending" stocks is simply not responsive to todays fast changing regulatory climate. The I|Pumpa System is flexible and richly rewarding, especially in combination with its sister product, the I|Dumpa System.

This news release includes forward-looking statements that involve risks, half-truths and uncertainties, including the timely development and acceptance of new products, the impact of competitive products and pricing, the limited supply of naïve speculators in the OTC-BB market, timely funding of customers' projects, customer payments to the company and other risks laid out in amazing detail by the company in the reports filed with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission and their parole officer.



To: Tom C who wrote (3767)3/9/1999 8:50:00 PM
From: Josef Svejk  Respond to of 4295
 
Humbly report, Tom, seems everyone is ripping off FBNA ideas these days.

The latest Wired magazine just out, which has an all black matte cover with a large shiny title "LIGHTS OUT" and small "Learning to Love Y2k" between the words "LIGHTS" and "OUT," and three y2k articles inside, also has an "ABSOLUT Y2K" ad on the back.

Well, Bill's been there and done that, what, about a year ago?

magneticdiary.com

I remain humbly dreaming of more FBNA ripp-offs, by the mail slot of the FBN mail room, virtually near the first arch of the Mala Strana side of Charles Bridge,
where they serve great hot rum, gratis for me, yours truly, absolute,

Svejk
proofsheet.com